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No joke. I do this ALL THE TIME....

Posted Aug 23 2008 10:14pm

No joke. I do this ALL THE TIME. And every time, I have this vague feeling that saying, “What happened, sweetie?” is just not the right response. I read this today and I had an “aha!” moment about this very typical response, and I am looking forward to changing my response from this moment forward!

THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle

www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygr oove

:: “What Happened?!” ::

A crying child runs into the house from outside,

seeking comfort. The well-meaning parent’s first

words: “What happened?!”

This common reaction is one of many subtle ways we

teach our children values that we ourselves never

consciously chose…

* What happened (the past) is more important than

what’s happening now (the present).

* Reason is more important than emotions. You can’t

simply have a feeling; you have to explain *why*.

* Things happen TO you. You don’t create your own

experience.

A few decades later, this child will be reading Daily

Groove messages reminding her to stay *present*, that

feelings *are* important, and that we *do* create our

own experiences! :-)

The next time you’re about to ask your child what

happened, decide instead to be still — to be fully

present with your child, appreciate his or her

emotional journey, and enjoy the feeling of

connection.

** Additional insights about this Groove are posted

at http://dailygroove.net/what -happened

Feel free to forward this message to your friends!

(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)

Copyright (c) 2008 by Scott Noelle

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