And all this time I've had this flare, I've been checking in on my pelvic-floor muscles to see what they're doing. They aren't always completely relaxed, but they are at least sitting on the couch munching on popcorn in front of the TV. I mean, what else are they supposed to be doing? One doc says, pelvic-floor muscles, that's your problem! So I go to the physical therapist and she doesn't really tell me anything except the "elevator" metaphor -- that I'm at 2 or 3 and should be at 1. Or is it 0. Is 0 for peeing? Let's say I should be at 0 and Basement is for peeing.
Anyway, I run out of insurance, so I go up there myself and teach my pelvic-floor puppies how to lie down. So now they're back and off to the side, aware but not at attention. But I don't see any real improvement in my pain. Am I doing something wrong? Did I put my puppies in the wrong place?
When I flare as bad as I have been, I keep my puppies in the BASEMENT -- because pushing out is the only way to keep my vulva from touching itself and making itself hurt worse. I do it without even thinking about it. And I've gotten better at not reacting to my everyday pain by going up a floor or two. But I still feel like I'm missing something.
The therapist did say that therapy could help but probably not resolve my problem. So I guess this is the wall.