About 2 days ago I had to fly on a plane. I have gotten tired of spending 6 and 1/2 hours on an uncomfortable seat. After a flight across the country my sit bones hurt, my back hurts, basically my whole body hurts. So this time I decided to bring along the special cushion I use in my car for driving around. I have been avoiding this moment for a long time. I'm not a 65 year old woman, I shouldn't have to travel around with an extra cushion that obviously looks like you have some sort of ass problem.
I walked throuhout the airport completely self conscious of what other people were thinking. I had to board two different planes with cushion in tow.
This is the part about this condition that I hate the most. The visible indicators that something is wrong. I know that vulvodynia is the last thing that will go through someone's mind when they see a girl carrying around a cushion, but frankly I don't like the alternatives any better. This is normally a silent condition, which is not much better, but at least I can usually suffer in private. No one else has to know.
Needless to say the cushion did actually help a little. It allowed me to sit on something other than the hard flotation devices they make you sit on normally. Still I hated the feeling that everyone was judging. Way self conscious of me I know.... but what can I say. This condition makes me self conscious.