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Breast Cancer and Domestic Violence - October's step-sisters for awareness

Posted Oct 04 2010 12:00am

October is a big month for women.  It is Breast Cancer Awareness Month and Domestic Abuse Awareness Month , both potentially deadly killers of women, in epidemic proportions.  Two of my dear friends have had breast cancer, one many years ago and one this past year.  Both of these women handled their illness with grace, through the loss of hair, breasts and life as they knew it. Thankfully, both of my friends have returned to good health and are living great lives, not always the case.

P4150231 My family has personal experience with domestic violence . It feels like an emotional and psychological cancer with potentially disastrous physical consequences. We go into remission and then BOOM!, it returns unexpectedly, sending our family into turmoil. We were taken by surprise last June with an unexpected recurrence.


My daughter went into hiding for 10 days and the last week of school for our Gkidz was either very interrupted or missed entirely.  Our Gkidz are lucky, in that they have two sets of grandparents very committed to their safety and welfare. This is not always the case. 


The toll was huge, financially and emotionally, for all of us. 
He was eventually arrested and is now in a minimum security facility.


Both of these life threatening conditions, breast cancer and domestic violence, have feelings of powerlessness woven through them like a snake winding its way around its prey.  It pretty scary, but to stay in fear is unproductive and it gives the disease or perpetrator way too much power.


Our family is working hard to find a way through this worry-filled swamp. It's tricky to be appropriately cautious and also to not live in fear, all at the same time.  Most humans dance this dance in various degrees.  Sometimes the fears are created by making stories up of worst case scenarios and sometimes the fears are in response to real life dangers. 


Whatever the cause of our fear and sense of powerlessness, it is very important to have a voice.  It is in this spirit that I wrote this post and also that we are having a family meeting tomorrow, which will include our two teen grandsons, to brainstorm ways to stay safe, live our lives and love each other through this cancer.  It is our own emotional chemotherapy.


Speak out today, the rest of October and all year long about Domestic Violence Awareness and Breast Cancer Awareness, step-sisters in cause. 
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