For a long time I thought that I was fat just because I ate too much. And I am, in a way. But after years of reading up on weight and following my own intuition, I know it's much more than just the food.
I was watching Oprah one day (before my kids took over the TV). I think it was the episode where she was discussing how and why she gained back the weight. And she explained that it was because her life was out of balance, so she was stressed out and started eating. She also said that there is always a reason - there is something going on emotionally that causes someone to overeat. Its never just about the food.
Ever since watching that show, I've thought about my reasons. Why am I 100 pounds overweight? Why did I let myself get this heavy? Here's what I've come up with so far:
I'm a person who strives for approval. I always want everyone to like me, and when they don't I get upset. Food provided comfort at times when I didn't get the approval I was looking for.
At one point in my life I was extremely depressed. During this time, I gained close to 50 pounds. Although I am no longer depressed, I incorporated those bad habits into my life, and have not replaced them with better habits.
I really have to work on the approval thing. I'm always afraid that someone is mad at me, isn't that strange? I want to learn how to not care too much how others think of me. I mean, if I did something to hurt someone, then they should tell me, but I think I'm a pretty nice person most of the time, so I don't think I hurt people very often!
It's a constant struggle to manage all the emotions and feelings that go along with being overweight. But I know that I must deal with these things in addition to the diet and exercise if I want to make this time the LAST time I lose weight.