I don't feel like I'm feeling down but I'm having a ton of anxiety today. I guess it's a mix of things, my son's issues, the owner of the gym not calling back about our refund for the biggest loser contest, email exchanges with hubby a few days ago, my best friend getting extensive plastic surgery today, weigh-in tonight at TOPS, and the list goes on. So what have I been doing about it? Eating chocolate out of the candy bowl here at work. It started with a fun size snickers, then a mini reeses cup, then I went back up later for a fun size baby ruth and another mini reeses cup. I'm feeling like I could go back up there and get about 10 more. Then of course there are the nuts that I have already had a serving of. Right now I'm eating my soup and trying to ease my inner turmoil. I just want to be normal. But then really what the heck is normal anyway? Then the past few days I've been eating a serving of twigs (fiber one original cereal). I bought it because it had a crazy amount of fiber in it and I had been having some bathroom issues lol. Well no more, I can tell ya lol. This stuff really cleans you out lol. But it also has given me tummy pains and made the gym experience last night not so great lol. I did make it to the gym last night. Hubby said he wasn't feeling good so he stayed home with the kids and I went alone. I went at like 6:40 but the gym was still super packed for some reason. I ended up having to do my floor exercises on the "guys" side back in the corner. I did ok with not feeling super anxious and made it through my workout ok. I just wasn't up for the treadmill with my tummy issues though and ended up just doing 15 mins on the recumbent bike afterwards. After I got home hubby was all upset about our son taking 3 hours to do his homework and ending up yelling at him. After the boy went to bed we sat and talked about what we can do to help motive him. My nephew suggested more instant rewards. He minded me how we had handled him at 11 and what had worked and how he felt. It was good feedback and made us both feel a lot better. So this morning I gave the boy the low down on the new possibility of instant rewards and to my amazement he went in and brushed his teeth before school. So I'm hopeful maybe this will work. I've had such guilt concerning my son. I know I need to let that go and just do what I can now for him. I just want him to want to do better but I know that's on him.
Anyway, I guess I'm still in a bit of funk. But at least I'm having a bit more hope to bring myself out of it quicker.