“Because nothing is ever
good enough, I never finish anything.”
I weigh 187 pounds and I’m
5’4”. I’ve been trying to shed these extra pounds for at least the last 15
years. What must you think of me?
I can tell you what I think
of me. I’m a big, fat woman who is destined to be unhappy until I do something
about weighing so much.
My good friends say I’m
perfectionistic. Some perfectionistic, I never finish anything.
How did I get this way? I
didn’t get this way; I was born this
way. At least that’s what my father always said. He and my mother noticed that
even when I was a tiny baby I had to have things just so. My mother had to feed
me just so, and my father always had to play with me just so. If they didn’t, I
fussed; and they conformed. That’s the story.
You probably can guess the
rest. Every time I try to start dieting, I have to do it just so, which never
works. I get so filled with frustration and anger at myself that I end up
quitting, just stopping the diet. Then later, months or even a year later, I
start dieting again, with renewed hope.
I’d like to solve this
perennial problem, but I don’t know how. I’ve thought of buying a book on how
to stop emotional eating. But is it emotional eating? I don’t think so. It’s
far more pervasive than being an emotional eater. I need help.