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The one about my pre-wedding fat-farm trip during a riot

Posted Jul 12 2013 2:21pm
Gail and Terry, July 11, 1992.

I bought my wedding dress a size too small.

Why? Because even though I wore a size 12 in normal clothes, the evil Wedding Dress Gods didn't believe in "vanity sizing" back in 1992.

So to avoid paying extra for a plus-sized wedding dress, I crossed my fingers and ordered the 14.

There was still about an inch of me coming between the tiny buttons and the button holes and the big day was a couple months away. So I booked a weekend at the Oaks at Ojai . I called it a "fat farm" but actually it's a great, affordable spa in beautiful Ojai, Calif., about an hour or so from where I was living. I figured a weekend of super healthy food and lots of hiking and working out would help propel me toward getting that dress closed.

It just so happened that the weekend I drove up was the same weekend after the Rodney King trial verdict came down, and all of Southern California was thrown into turmoil.

I headed up the 101, practically the only car on the road as fires smoldered on either side of me. When I got up to Ojai, I still couldn't escape the news because I was in Ventura County, where the trial took place.

News junkie that I am, instead of meditating in a yoga class, I was glued to the TV in my room.

But events settled down, and I soon found my om, and powered through the salt- and caffeine-free meals, the nature hikes and aerobics classes.

Despite the unauthorized evening escapes to the frozen yogurt place down the street, I managed to lose 10 pounds that weekend.

By my wedding day (21 years ago today), the dress fit -- but I had to jerk my arms backwards to get those buttons shut.

So, "Cool story, bro" you say, but what's the point?

Thinking back on that day and how I sweated my ass off to get in that dress, I still thought of myself as a "fat bride." Because back then, all that mattered was the number on the scale (and home scales didn't measure particulars like muscle and water and fat).

So while today is my usual weigh-in day, I'm taking that sweet Wednesday weigh-in and using it today. It's close enough to Friday and it's great and I'll weigh myself next Friday.

And today I'll proclaim ...

I NEED A NEW MILESTONE GOAL.

I hit pre-baby weight a couple years ago and stayed there about 5 minutes. I'm not going to do that again. I'm there now, so my next milestone is ...

WEDDING WEIGHT.

Thank goodness I wasn't one of those skinny 20-somethings who wore a size 2 wedding dress. No, instead I was 30 years old and 190 pounds.

That's 45 pounds away, which is kind of a big chunk but I will get there. I'll take it 5 pounds at a time, so my immediate goal is 5 pounds.

Let's do this!

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