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The headache that never went away: Part 1 - My buddy and me

Posted Jun 02 2008 6:04pm

I've had the My Buddy jingle stuck in my head lately. It was a catchy song played during an ad for a doll sold in the 1980's. (As well as the gender opposite toy, Kid Sister.) Thanks to the wonders of YouTube you can watch it here:

The lyrics are:
My buddy (my buddy), my buddy (my buddy),
Wherever I go, he goes
My buddy (my buddy), my buddy (my buddy),
My buddy and me

Only I change the lyrics to:
My headache (my headache), my headache (my headache),
Wherever I go, it goes
My headache (my headache), my headache (my headache),
My headache and me

Remember that headache I had back in March? The one I thought had gone away? Well, it eased up for awhile there, but it never really went away. Which means I've been in pain 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, ever since February 18th, 2008. (I still have a scar from that monster zit too.) I ran my half-marathon with my headache. I went to my book release party with my headache. I appeared on TV with my headache. I toured New York with my headache. *sing song* My headache and me!

It hasn't been a series of headaches, just one never-ending headache that will not go away. (Like Iraq, or the presidential primary.) I've been doing a lot of reading on headaches, and mine is best described as a chronic tension-type headache. I feel a constant pressure or tightening around my forehead, behind my nose, and around my cheeks. Some days it's pretty tolerable and I'm able to do the dishes and live a semblance of a normal life. Some days it's really bad and all I can do is watch streaming movies from Netflix on my laptop in bed.

I decided not to talk about my headache here for several reasons. My medical issues seemed to be a topic to keep in the "Do not blog about" circle of my personal Venn diagram. When I did talk about the headache months ago, I got tired of people diagnosing me with everything from lupus to a dead twin in my forehead. I also wanted to have fun with my book release in May. I didn't want people to feel sorry for me and I didn't want it to be a topic of conversation during all the talking I've been doing. As a natural introvert, I've learned how to put on a fake, extroverted exterior when the situation demands it. I'm sure many people in my life have had no idea that I've been constantly suffering since the end of February - except for the select few who have been kind enough to listen to my bitching and occasional crying on the telephone. Other than that, I've kept it between me and my neurologist. (Yes, I have a neurologist now!)

However, dealing with this headache has become such a gigantic part of my life that it's starting to get weird not blogging about it. It's like Godzilla has come to town, cutting a swath of destruction through my life, and I'm blogging about how nice the weather is. It's getting to a point where it's affecting my weight too, so I may as well come clean before the horrifying weigh-in at the end of the month. Blogging about my weight loss issues seemed to help me lose weight, so perhaps blogging about my chronic pain will help me manage that as well.

Tomorrow, I'm going to go over all the treatments I've tried, all the treatments that are still on the list to try, possible causes I've considered and all the tests I've taken (sadly none of which involved filling in bubbles on a Scantron sheet, which I kind of enjoy). So, please, please, PLEASE, DEAR GOD, PLEASE!!! hold off on diagnosing me with anything or recommending any treatments for me until that post tomorrow. It is a long, looooooooong, post and if I tacked it onto this entry your monitor would not have enough pixels to display it. The day after that I'll blog about all the ways this headache is destroying the lovely life I have spent so many years building. My headache: A three-part series.

Also, from now on we can just consider this my health/fitness/chronic pain management blog, because really, they're all linked.

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