You may have an opinion, and that is fine, but please don’t pretend to know how hard it is to be me. That doesn’t mean you can’t help me, it just means that you must realize that there are some things you just aren’t going to understand. Also, you have to realize that it doesn't matter how much YOU want me to change, I have to want it for myself. It's not the mechanics I lack at times, it's the motivation.Show me someone who is just as fat (or fatter) than me who actually did it. Don’t push me a trendy product or a fad diet. Putting ON this weight wasn’t a fad nor was it because of a trendy fattening meal. It was a long history of destructive habits and unhealthy choices. It’s ridiculous to think that doing anything but dealing with those habits and choices that got me into this mess will get me out.I cannot force you to change nor can you me. If you want to really help someone make a change in their life for the better, it needs to start from a place of compassion. Ask yourself: “Why do I want that person to change?”
“ Is it because they are different than me? “
“Is it because I believe I am right and they are wrong?”
“Is it because I think these people are a drain on healthcare?”
“Do I feel less respect for them as a person because the respect themselves less?”
If you answered yes, your motivation to help me are self centered. Do you care about ME? Are you going to help me if I fail again?
Will you care enough to know when to NOT give advice and just listen to me figure things out?
Do you value the qualities that I DO possess even though I am fat?
When I cheer, will you cheer with me? When I cry, will you cry with me?
Will you remind me that the person I am now is not the best that I have to offer?
If so, you can make a difference in my life. You are ready to help someone like me. If not, it’s best not to bother trying to help me.To those that have been that friend to me through my weight struggles, thank you. You have made all the difference my life. As I have seen people like this stand out in my life, I am overwhelmed.