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My letter to Parenting Magazine

Posted Oct 22 2009 10:04pm
There I was sitting next to my wife while she was giving birth to our son.

There I was with a mask on in a room full of surgeons. I was already on pins and needles. This did not help.

During my wife's pregnancy I read a lot of books on parenting and childbirth. I have them all.

The funny thing is as many books as I read, I sat there not knowing anything, just praying for the best. You can not study for childbirth.

Our dream was to have a baby. That dream came true in October of 2008 when two lines showed up on a test.

I remember when I found out my wife was pregnant, I needed to be a better person. I was already a good guy, responsible, loving, and caring.

Now I wanted to be a great father. I had to find out how.

I asked all of my friends and family members what makes a great father. Everyone gave me different answers.

I am also very luck because I have a great father.

But I needed to find my own way.

My wife's pregnancy was rough. The baby was always healthy, but my wife pinched a nerve in her spine and was not able to be fully mobile for about six weeks.

During that time I took off work.

It was a job that I have put my heart and soul in for the last six years. It was hard for me to take time off, but it was harder for them. We have since parted ways, and I have no regrets.

So there I was on a June night in Florida. Next to my wife in the hospital, scared yet excited. Nervous yet overwhelmed with joy.

That is when something was different with me. I asked so many people what it takes to be a great father. I think I just had to go with passion and desire.

I want to be there for my son. I want to make an impact in his life. I want him to look at me as his hero. Just like I did to my Dad.

I hear about so many "deadbeat" Dads and fathers who do not want to take ownership for their children. It is all over the media.

Well, I wanted it. More than anything I have ever wanted.

I could not tell you if I am a good father. Hopefully my son will in a few years.

Around 9:40 PM in June I heard my son crying. So much emotion went through me.

That cry changed my life forever.

I was balling. I was trying to tell my wife the three words we have talked about for so many months.

And finally, after all the tears, I was able to say them....

"He has hair"

Side Note- I lost over 220 pounds in the last two years and maintained it for the last year.

Sincerely,

Tony Posnanski
AKA Theantijared (theantijared.blogspot.com)
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