My lift tonight marked the end of my 7th month of weight lifting. That’s a pretty long time and I’m really proud of it. After the lift I thought back to the way things were back in August when I first started. I’ve changed a lot.
Physically the difference is night and day. My wife is constantly commenting on how much I’ve shaped up. Whenever I see a family member I haven’t seen in a while they freak out.
I’m really happy with my lower body. There is definition in my quads, calves and even my backside. This is so weird because I’ve always been the fat guy with no butt. Now I’m the fat guy with an average sized butt. This is a good thing because that’s the area that my wife won’t shut up about. Since I had nothing there to begin with it’s mostly muscle so that’s cool.
My upper body is still a work in progress. My chest still needs a some work and my stomach is holding a lot of fat. Both have decreased significantly though and I’m not really self conscious about them all the time like I used to be. My stomach doesn’t hang over my belt now. In fact I can stand without tightening it up, look down and see my shoes. I couldn’t do that back in August.
Emotionally I’m a completely different person. I’m a lot more confident now. I look people in the eye. I have a general feeling that I belong wherever I am. I don’t know if that makes any sense but when I was 350 I had this idea in my head that I was constantly bothering people. That they didn’t want to get stuck talking to the fat guy. I’m still a fat guy but I don’t have that feeling any more.
People treat me differently now. I get a lot more respect. In fact I demand it. People ask me to do things for them and if I don’t want to I tell them no. It felt impossible to do something like that before. I had this feeling that if I said no then they wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore. I think the opposite is probably true. People know that I actually have a spine! They respect me more and in turn like me more. Why isn’t this stuff taught in schools?
I can’t really put my finger on why but I think the respect thing also has a lot to do with the eye contact thing. I’ve noticed that my conversations last a little longer and I’m the one ending them more times than not. Also, people at work actually invite me to lunch! I don’t think that’s ever happened in my life! I ask them to lunch. I know that’s never happened in my life!
It really gets me when I see people who walk around with their head down. It’s kind of uncomfortable to be around them. They’re just not fun. It’s a real burden to feel like you’re walking on eggshells trying not to hurt someone’s feelings. That’s who I was. That’s why people treated me like they did. It had nothing to do with the fat and everything to do with how I carried myself.
It’s really hard to fake confidence. That’s why I’m glad I’ve committed to my workout plans. It has boosted my self esteem tremendously. I’ve worked really hard and achieved results. I’m not even halfway to my goal and I’ve already gotten more than I ever could have hoped for out of this experience.