God, I've said this a thousand times. I've written numerous posts on this topic and yet it continues to elude me. What the heck is wrong with me???
Back on October 30th I made the decision to stop trying to lose weight. For so long this has been a large part of my focus that it had become a way of life. I decided to watch what I eat, keep portions small, and workout consistently. I've been doing that for the past 2 weeks and something really wonderful has happened.
I have begun to focus on the things my body can do and not what it looks like. My body image has improved immensely. I had no idea. Focusing on the positive aspects of my body causes me to see more and more positive things. When I was so focused on weight loss and what was wrong with my body, that's all I saw was the bad things. This is a great breakthrough.
What really pisses me off though is I knew this. I've discovered it a number of times. I've lived it and learned it over and over and over and over........... What the hell is wrong with me???
So there you have it. I'm focusing on keeping my diet clean and getting in my workouts and screw the weight. I don't care if I don't look perfect in a swimsuit, I can do a triathlon!! I can run. I can bike. I can swim. So even though I'm not the skinny person I'd like to be, I'm the athlete I've always wanted to be. I get up before the sun to get my workouts in, it's just a good thing I don't have solar lighting or I'd be doing it in the dark.
So this realization has set me free. It has released something in my mind that has been weighing me down (pun intended :). Instead of thinking about food every waking second of the day, I can focus on other, more important things. This is good.