Hi! Nice to Meet You! My Name is Tony, and I Have Loose Skin!
Posted Jun 10 2009 12:20am
Time is running out, and I cannot keep up. I just can't. I have two rough drafts due next week, and my brain is frozen. Spring is here, but for some reason I have yet to thaw. I keep telling myself to go to the library and get shit done, but all I can do is lay here. I am wrecking my life up. It's so easy to unravel, isn't it?
When my stress levels are this high, I feel like swimming in a pool of gluttony. It's that sense of urgency bursting out of your body, giving you an insatiable hunger for everything you love to eat. I could only do so much to tame the beast today. I ended up having an order of tofu fried rice, a BBQ pork bun, and a few bowls of cereal. Right now, I'm alert and tempted to go to Taco Bell for one last hurrah, but I will fight the good fight.
You know, this is random, but yesterday I was at a St. Patrick's day celebration thing at a pub. I was talking to this person, and told her I had a bunch of loose skin. Who the fuck tells a stranger that they have loose skin? I don't even think I have that much. I really am socially inept.
I realize that my life is extremely unfocused right now. I have no idea what I'm doing, and my anxiety is purely due to my own unwillingness to take the next step. God, I hate pity parties like this, because I am very fortunate compared to A LOT of people, but I'm letting it all go to waste.
Thank you everyone who responded to my idea for my senior paper. I am going to try my best to get to the library tomorrow and do some research. If the idea remains intact after I'm done bashing my head against the books, I'll start thinking of interview questions.
So, here I am. Why, isn't it beautiful outside! You can't even see one glimmering star---not even one...