Guest "post": Spousal Support?

Another email in my box today, shared with you all anonymously with permission to get your ideas, suggestions, words of advice, wisdom, experiences, what have you?

Long story short - married couple - one has had WLS and is near goal, another is in the pre-op "maybe I will" stage.  The pre-op says that they might not want to go through with it because they don't want to give up their habits, eating junk, drinking alcohol and smoking salad.  So, what now?

"I don’t want to post on OH as I am not in the mood to hear people’s lectures right now.   So I was thrilled to hear my hubby was starting (planning for WLS.)  Anyway he is not willing to give up his social life for this surgery.

He tells me he likes his social life and is not sure he is ready to give it up. I am trying to stay out of it as I don’t want to be blamed if it isn’t all pink and sunshiny after. I get blamed for most things...

I believe I am turning into a WLS statistic and getting disgusted with him and his inability to follow through on anything and his non-interest in improving his life. Let’s just lay around and bitch about everything. This is not just the weight loss it is the job, family everything.

We have had a few conversations about divorce in the last few years. If we weren't ... on I probably would have gotten out by now. I wish he would follow through on something and I think before when we were both on the couch it wasn't a problem but now I am tired of that.  As I said before I wasn't going to change after surgery but I feel like I changed when I got fat and now I am back to who I was when I was thin and he didn't know me then.

 

Blog away- I can't be the only person feeling like this."