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Posted Dec 23 2008 9:43pm
I’m having a week. Its just one of those gray, blah, nothing to say, purgatory weeks. Its not good, and its not bad, its just blech. I’ve been really unmotivated lately, and although I am dragging myself to the gym on my normal schedule I just feel really defeated. Every day as I’m changing into my gym clothes and scowling at the little dripping kid who’s making the floors slippery, I think to myself “What’s the point of all of this?” And it all really boils down to the fact that being alone during the holidays is draining. Its not seeing my family, not participating in our traditions, not having money to buy gifts, not having time for cookies, not having a Christmas party, and especially not being in a relationship. I know that its dumb to put self worth and contentedness in my romantic status and I normally don’t, but there is just something about the holiday season and the love and happiness that is shoved down our throats by the media (Love Actually was a poor movie choice this weekend) that really crystallizes in the forefront of my mind that I am in fact 27, have been single for 3 years, and have no prospects for any of that changing anytime soon. Making it worse, a friend of mine recently got engaged, another just started dating a new perfect guy, Blonde Friend went on a date with a guy she really likes, and I discovered that I can sneak 45 minutes on cardio equipment without getting caught. Yippee. I’ll get over this funk after the holidays; I just wish it were tomorrow.

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