PTSD Professional Perspective: People Taking Strides Daily, Part 2
Posted Dec 24 2010 6:22am
Last week coach Patty Jackson introduced us to People Taking Strides Daily by giving us the three steps toward taking daily strides. This week she expands upon each step.
(from work with a client who gave me permission to share):
Coach: What is it that you would like to experience differently?
Client: I’d like to feel comfortable talking about my business and getting people to use me for their printing needs.
Coach: What are you noticing that is happening when you talk to people?
Client: I am aware of the fact that every time I try to tell people what I do, I feel like they don’t understand me. My throat tightens up and I feel like I’m fumbling around for words. I notice that I don’t even see the person I’m talking to during that time. When I am finished, I see the person I’m talking to again. They look happy, like they understand me. They just never call me for their printing needs and I know some of them must need my printing service.
I can accept that I do this. I can accept that I feel this way. I can accept the tightening in my throat. I’m aware that the tightening in my throat goes away when I’m done talking. I’m aware that the last time I did this, the person I was talking to seemed to be thinking about what I said. I am aware that she knows another printer from her church.
I can totally love myself in this confusion and this situation even though I am aware that it makes me feel really frustrated. I am aware of the frustration. I can accept it, even though it feels really bad. Ok. I don’t completely accept this frustration.
(Here is where the client breathes and allows the totally normal human energy/emotion of frustration to be accepted. It moved through his entire body. It wasn’t entirely comfortable, but he knew he was safe to be feet it. With it came more awareness…)
I am aware that I want business so badly that I almost want to pull people in my door and say SEE THIS IS HOW BEAUTIFUL MY WORK IS. DO BUSINESS WITH ME!!!!!! …and that is not working for me.
I can totally accept & love myself even in this situation.
Coach: It sounds like you are ready to get clear on what you DO want.
Client: Absolutely. OK, my desire is to talk to people about what I do without being afraid that I am saying it right. I want to talk to people about what I do without trying to get them to understand.
Coach: I hear you want to talk to people without some things. If you were talking without being afraid, that would be talking with what?
Coach: Great. And if you weren’t trying to get them to understand, what would you be doing as you spoke about what you did?
Client: I’d be talking to them with confidence, knowing I am understandable. I want to know I am understood and my work is appreciated. I want to know that I can communicate what I do to others. And, I want those who want what I do to easily find me. I don’t want to be the one responsible for going out and getting customers. I want customers to go out and find me.
Coach: Excellent. So you want to talk to people with confidence that you are understood and just enjoy conversations with people outside of work and you want customers to search and find you. Is that it?
Client: Yeah! I just want to talk to people and enjoy being with them. I want my business conversations to be isolated to my business interactions and have that be enough. I want my business to pick up from the ads I placed and the other work I have done.
Coach: Do you notice how good that feels to be clear on that desire? Where do you feel the opening in your body?
(Awareness in opening and what is working!!!! with acceptance and self love.)
Client: Yeah, my chest feels lighter… and my throat feels tingly.
Coach: Is there more to your desire?
Client: Yeah, I am really excited about the idea of my conversations with people I meet to just be for the purpose of talking to them and not having to try so hard. It’s not working any way. I’ve been trying and trying and trying to get more business and it is driving me nuts, and its not working. I am going to trust the advertising means I invested in and I am going to enjoy talking to people for now. It feels great to just let go and realize I have done enough. What I have done should work. In fact, I had a big new order last week and I’m working with another company on another one.
Coach: Awesome. It sounds like you have a lot of awareness of things that ARE working now, too. Excellent job letting go, seeing what is working, and accepting it. Great shift in focus. Can you see how putting your energy and attention here might continue your strides to more of your desires; business growth AND people connections?
Client: Yes, what a relief!
Coach: So, I invite you to open to fully receive these customers and other new ways of bringing them in. Sound good?
Client: Sounds great! Thanks!
Coach: You are welcome. And I encourage you to go through these three steps when you feel stuck AND when you have a success! Being aware of what is working is a powerful thing too.
Have fun with the three steps to people taking strides daily. Notice and fully receive the small, wonderful changes you are making as your path for more great strides and daily successes unfolds through you and in front of you.
Patty Jackson is a relationship life coach and founder of THRIVE! Wisdom of Life Coaching School. Her specialty revolves around bringing awareness and acceptance to all emotions and all parts of humanity. She has developed Seven Steps to Creating Positive Change and incorporates them in her one on one coaching practice, as well as in her 12 week program designed to teach people how to coach themselves. Patty trains and certifies people in Wisdom of Life Coaching. Patty has been featured in M Magazine, Lake Country Living on the Lake, on WISN radio and Fox 6 Wake Up News.
The opinions in this post are solely those of the author. To contribute to ‘Professional Perspective’ contact Michele .