Somedays I feel like I am in a mix of chaos, treading water, just trying to stay focused and centered on what is really important in life.
Right now things are crazy for me. My mom has moved out of the house she sold. This was the dream retirement house for her and my dad but it is too much work for her alone. She knew, as we all did, that it was best to sell it after his death. I am happy for her but torn inside. I have woken up in the middle of the night shedding tears for this house and feel I am mourning my dad again. If I feel like this only God knows how heart wrenching it must be for my mom. If only I lived closer and could help.....
Today also marks the day that dear hubby's son #2 graduates from high school. Yes, this is happy times but I am sure it has been taking an emotional toll on dear hubby as he goes through this life change with son #2. But unfortunately the communication lines at home are currently scrambled and I really don't know. No worries, it will sort itself out in due time. That happens with communication.
And work it amazingly chaotic, uncertain, scary, dramatic.....and I could go on. Nothing terribly terrible but still enough to keep my mind spinning.
And in the middle of this darling daughter has a cold and a cough that is keeping her, and me, up most of the night. Exhaustion is building and I feel helpless in not being able to do a thing to bring her relief. Such a sad feeling.
But if you think about it, life is like running. I know God doesn't give me anything I can't handle and that each challenge makes me stronger, like each run makes me stronger. And with each new PR I push myself a bit further to go faster, or longer, to test my limits. Life is like that too. With each challenge I overcome I will get a new one that pushes me, tests me, and drives me to be the best me that I can be. And when it is all said and done, I will be fine. The chaos will settle and life will be spinning happily along again.
I must thank my city run for my positive attitude. Even though I had life roadblocks I still opted to run before work. I knew I needed it personally. I knew after work things would be tight with getting ready for graduation. I knew darling daughter will need my full, loving attention after school. I needed to run this morning and I didn't want the gym treadmill so I did something different. I ran right out the gym door and did a run through the city, a run that will be my new gym loop. It was fun. I had dirt, grass, and cement. And this city isn't necessarily the same as your city. Check it out!
I ran 1.6 miles and although it was brief, it was good. My overall pace was 8'41" and I didn't feel like I was pushing it. It felt like a nice, easy and relaxing run. And this has me happy because I need to maintain a 9'40" (or less) pace this Saturday on my uphill 10K in order to finish at 59:56. My run today was short and pretty flat but I think it bodes well with me achieving my goal Saturday....I think.
Daily Gratitude: I am thankful my mom's dream came true and that she will be moving into a new home soon. Daily Affirmation: I am at peace with the universe. I trust what it has in store for me. I can endure the storms.