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Swimming and SpongeBob Squarepan ...

Posted Jun 13 2009 12:00am
Swimming and SpongeBob Squarepants

I went back to the inner city pool for my swim today, after crossing over to the fancy swim joint last week. I was disappointed, again, the nice pool was filled to capacity with older woman doing water aerobics. I was still able to swim, but on the other side that incorporates the fancy lazy river thing. The swim lanes were shallow and overly warm; the checkered black and white tiled pool bottom made me dizzy. Back at the inner-city pool, I got a warm fuzzy feeling walking through the area between the pool and the locker rooms--it smells like the kind of cologne favored by elderly black men. The locker room itself, smells like feet, but what the hell...I love this place.

Larry the Lifeguard had some loud indiscernible rap going on the loudspeakers. He didn't even notice me coming into the pool today, so immersed was he in his fancy DVD player. I stopped to greet him and see what he had going today. He clearly prefers historical gladiator type epic movies, replete with lots of blood and violence. There was a small group of elderly men bobbing around doing their "therapy", but the swim lane was to be all mine. I tucked in the hair, donned the goggles, and went to work. I was going to do a crawl for 45 continuous minutes. That would work out to be just over a mile.

As I was watching the black line and the wavy pattern of shimmering octagons on the pool bottom, I was thinking about SpongeBob Squarepants and his little cadre of sea critters hanging out on the bottom of Bikini Bottom. My son has started to loosen his grip slightly on dragons and now he's really into SpongeBob SquarePants. I have a hard time sitting down to watch T.V., but I've finally sat down and watched a few episodes with my son. It's really a very clever show. My sister made some flip comment that she won't let her kids watch SpongeBob because it's mindless brain rot that will decrease their chances of getting into a reputable college. Oh help me Please!! Well, I think she's wrong. It's a very clever show, creatively done and funny as hell. And if it loosens the grip on the dragon obsession, then I'm all for it. A few other benefits have come from the arrival of Sponge Bob into our lives. It's something that I like too, so my son and I have something to talk and laugh about, rather than hearing my usual rambling motherly litany of do this and pick up that, and do your homework; we can laugh about the latest episodes of Sponge Bob. I could never really get into his dragon thing as much as I tried to be interested.

SpongeBob has been highly motivating for my son. I can tell him that he's more than welcome to watch it as long as all his homework is done. The last few nights he's gotten his homework done in record time, rather than the slow distractible way he plods through it normally. Last weekend we rented SpongeBob SquarePants: The Movie. My son made the comment yesterday that I remind him of Sandy the Squirrel. Now, I almost wanted to cry. That is the highest form of a compliment coming from my eleven year old son, never one to dish out compliments. To be compared to that spunky strong little squirrel just made me beam. Now, he compared his sister to the whining whale named Pearl and his father was compared with the sullen Squidward, so I don't think they're as happy with their comparisons, but Sandy the Squirrel rocks!!
My arms were having a hard time loosening up today, but after 10 laps I was feeling real strength behind my strokes. All those sadistic cable fly exercises were starting to pay off. I think I essentially ripped every muscle fiber in my upper body with Sean's workout last week. Now all those muscle fibers are healing up, plumping up with new layers of fibrous muscle strength. I'm going to be a force to be reckoned with. 20 laps into my swim I was feeling like a female David Hasselhuff slicing through the ocean with SpongeBob and Patrick on my rippling back--valiantly returning my sea critter charges back to the safety of Bikini Bottom. Yeah...I know this is a really stupid metaphor, but this is the kind of shit that goes through my mind on a mile swim.

I finished my mile swim and lurched myself out of the water and into the hot tub where that little group of older men were finishing up their "therapy". The one guy said he was very impressed with my swimming, that I looked like a very strong swimmer. I thanked him and have been beaming ever since...I do feel strong today.
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