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Race Report: Santa Rosa Half Marathon

Posted Aug 31 2012 12:03pm
Let's go ahead and just get one thing out of the way... My goal for this race was to run around 1:50. Spoiler alert: I failed. But, my other goal was just to honest-to-god race the shit out of those 13.1 miles. And, I'm happy to report, I did accomplish that.

For whatever reason (probably because I was fucking wasted the night before), I was kind of a mess on Sunday morning. I got up and felt fine and got dressed and ready, but I hadn't laid anything out the night before, I hadn't pinned on my bib or put my tag on my shoe. Normally, these are all things I do the night before a race. All I did the night before this race was drink a beer in bed and pass out.

Regardless, I somehow managed to get out of the hotel room and into the car with my bib, shoe tag and the right clothes on. Win! About 3 minutes into the drive I realized... awwww fuck! I forgot my watch! Fail! KoB offered to turn around so I could go get it, but I didn't want to be late to meet our friends. "I'll be fine without my watch," I said casually to KoB. He said something like "oh sure." But his face was saying... "bitch, you are fucked."

Now, for some background, KoB was going to pace our friend Jeff who wanted to run a 3:15 marathon. Was it any coincidence that they're room number for the weekend was 315?!?!?! Whoa. Anyway, we met up with them and headed to the start line.

It was overcast and 51 degrees at the start. PERFECT weather. Melissa and I ran a little warm up lap and I lined up in the corral with about 3 minutes before the start. Realizing that running without a watch didn't turn out too well for me the last time I tried it (OMFG the 10k where I ran a 7:19 first mile. Holy hell). I decided to line up between the 3:45 and 3:50 marathon pace groups. I knew that the 3:45 pace for a marathon was similar to what I needed to run for a 1:50 half.

This race felt like the LONGEST race in history. When I saw the first mile marker, I was sure that it was the 2nd mile marker and that I had missed the 1st one. WRONG. Only 1 mile down and it felt like the second mile of a 5k. I wasn't running too fast, the 3:45 pace group was well in front of me, but I was racing.

I started picking people in front of me and trying to either pass them or keep up with them. I kept telling myself over and over again that I was racing and that it was supposed to feel like this. My legs felt pretty good and the pace felt like what a half marathon effort should be.

See how cute the Run Bitches look? Ugh. Fucking Bitches.

The Sonsabitches in the orange singlet and the white singlet behind the orange.
So, while the sonsabitches and bitches are looking good and racing their own races... I'm in the battle of my life at mile 6ish of the race. Not just any battle, mind you... but a battle against a MIDGET. I saw her ahead of me and I was like... is that a bitch a midget? And as I got closer, I was like... hell yeah she's a midget! And obviously, I can't let a midget beat me. So I picked it up to get around her and as soon as I passed her, she sped up to keep up with me.
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