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How to Survive a Trip to IKEA

Posted Jun 17 2013 8:23am

Party dog and I went to IKEA yesterday…..which also happened to be our six year anniversary. Seems like a bad omen right? We somehow had an incredibly fight-free trip because I think I’ve finally figured out the secret to making it out of IKEA alive.


1.  Drink before you go.
It really doesn’t matter what time it is, if you’re going to IKEA you need it. We had brunch at 10:00 am yesterday which means we were drinking at 10:00 am. It’s totally acceptable to drink that early considering the day you’re about to have, so go for it.

2. Bring water.

There’s a very good chance you are about to spend hours at IKEA….just imagine how thirsty you are going to get. Do yourself a favor and come prepared. There’s nothing worse then wandering aimlessly around with your mouth dry and completely dehydrated. Bring water- trust me.


3.  Don’t go when it’s super hot out.

Is there anything worse than a horrible crowded IKEA on a hot summer day? No there isn’t. It’s a fact. If you go when it’s pushing 90 degrees outside, you may as well of gone to Disney World and chosen to get in the line for It’s a Small World. Nothing.Worse.

4. Go on a holiday.

We went on Father’s Day and it was remarkably less busy.  If you can mange to go on a holiday you have  much a better chance of staying in that relationship of yours and not crawling up in the fetal position in a corner of the bargain basement and crying.


5. Have a plan going in.

This one is huge. Make a plan and STICK TO IT. That my friends, is the hard part. PartyDog and I figure out exactly what we need before going in and refuse to stray from the plan.  We started to stray yesterday in the office department but I got us back on track. We had a time limit of 2 hours in IKEA to stick to and we were cutting it close so we booked it to where we needed to actually be.

6. Don’t just buy whatever is cheapest.

THIS is where IKEA gets you. There’s always a super cheap option and an option a bit more expensive that look nearly identical.  You spend a few minutes contemplating which one to get but it’s a no brainier to get the $25.00 book shelf right? WRONG! Unless you want a call at work from your partner saying “the Billy bookcase died this morning. It just gave up and fell apart” two months after you purchase the thing, spend the extra money.


7. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and compromise.

I won’t lie, I felt the tears coming in the desk department yesterday. But I refused to succumb to my typical storm out of IKEA in tears and leave with nothing drama. So I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and compromised with my beloved PartyDog. It worked!

8. Cut the crap-get to the point.

I can’t tell you how many fights have started from “I really don’t care, what do you think” going back and forth to each other. Because the thing is, YOU DO CARE. You care so much but you don’t want the other person to know, and IKEA has so many options you get so  frazzled that you can’t make up your damn mind. So cut the crap people- get to the point and say exactly what you’re thinking. AND GET OUT.


And that is how you too can have a fight and tear-free trip to IKEA. Oh and don’t forget to buy the cinnamon bun once you checkout-you deserve it after the hell you just went through.


That’s all the nonsense I have for now!

Tell me about your worst IKEA trip!

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