What Is Okay With Online Dating And When You’ve Gone Too Far
Posted Mar 15 2012 7:00pm
Online dating is much different than traditional dating. Online dating can lead to the need for perfection. It’s OK to be picky. At ﬁrst, being picky seems to be out of the question because you’re not really seeing any action. But beware, when things start to pick up, you will end up being at the receiving end of several hundred replies and offers for dates. Before you jump in, come up with a plan to screen the women you go for.
At ﬁrst you send an email to a girl who has great photos and lives near you. But what if you ﬁnd out through her reply that she isn’t your type? For instance, what if you get an e-mail response with a sentence that says, “By the way, I really know how to please a man. I used to be one.”
When I saw this in my inbox, I immediately freaked out. I went to their online dating proﬁle and I was looking at this pictures and thinking, “Oh my god, this is a transsexual? You have got to be kidding me.” The lesson that I learned with that was you really never know what to expect so you have to be prepared to screen who you go for as the correspondence on the site progresses.
Having sex , getting a girlfriend and landing more dates than you can imagine are priorities, but always remember what you’re there for: to be with women you really dig. It’s OK to screen the women you date. Every month I was getting 30 to 50 phone numbers.
I was on the phone nonstop, setting up dates and running it like a business. At one point I got this e-mail from a girl and she seemed pretty nice. She had a headshot picture. I wasn’t too sure so I was like, “Hey, that’s just a headshot picture.
Do you have another picture you can send me?” Don’t’ be afraid to ask for pictures. If you’re not sure about going on a first date with a woman, ask for pictures. What’s interesting is when you ask a woman for pictures it kind of sets up the frame of you are selecting her and you’re not really sure about her so she’s going to have to prove yourself to you.
Now think about how powerful that is psychologically. This is all going on before you even meet. If a woman goes down that path, she’s already basically said mentally to herself, “This guy’s in control. I’m supplicating to him. I’m chasing after him.” So it’s very powerful.
Don’t be afraid of rejection . A lot of guys are afraid to ask. Being in control of who you date is a good thing, and it will increase your market value exponentially. When women realize you’re abiding by your own rules, they subconsciously follow.
It’s OK to meet women online. The reason why I’m devoting a section on this is because I’ve met men who think it’s beneath them to get dates online. Some may even say those who use internet dating sites to meet girls can’t do it the “normal” way.
I’ll be the ﬁrst to admit that I got into online dating sites because picking up girls in bars didn’t work for me, but after I’ve gotten used to dating women I meet online, and building relationships and friendships with these women, the same ‘stereotype’ for guys who go online because they couldn’t meet girls in bars didn’t apply anymore.
Think about online dating like you’re on a train. You start slowly then you gather speed, and soon it’s going so fast that you forget about how slow it was when it started. When you get your groove on and you’re having the time of your life meeting and dating women, your confidence grows and your social life gets better.
When you get to this point, does it mean you’re going to stop using the internet to get dates? Heck, no. Online dating is a PART of a strategy that works, and because it’s working beautifully for you, you can keep at it. Frankly, any guy who snubs online dating is seriously missing out.
Singles who are worth dating are really busy, either with school or work. They’re also constantly connected to the net to check emails. During a busy work week, they will not have time to go out and meet people at night to unwind, BUT they can spend several minutes to a few hours to log in to Facebook, their favorite dating sites, or both.
What do all these mean to you? If you meet and correspond with a gorgeous woman through internet dating during the time she’s actively looking, you can easily schedule a date with her for the weekend or the next. If you’re so inclined, you can take her to meet with your friends or hers in a bar where a multitude of men are ogling your date, hoping they could meet someone like her that night.