“I should be married/in a serious relationship.” (Always a popular one with the single gals)
“I should be more outgoing, well known, successful.”
Quite frankly, if you keep should-ing all over yourself like that, you’ll end up with a big ol’ fat mess…in your head: confusion, second guessing, self-blame, and many of the monsters discussed previously will start to surface. Put away the TP, here at PSG, we’ve devised a way to help clean the should up once and for all. Learn to stop should-ing on yourself with the 3 Gs: Gratitude, Genuineness, and Growth
Gratitude- Embrace the idea of being thankful. In life you have to stop and smell the roses. There are always one or two lying around somewhere that you may have forgotten about. It can be as simple as being thankful for the strength to wake up and conquer another day. It is possible to find gratitude in virtually every aspect/situation in life. What are you grateful for?
Genuineness- Focus on being the most genuine version of you that you can be. Reassess your goals, and be sure that what you want out of your life is truly what you want, and not based on the expectations of another (or trying to mimic another). We are happier, healthier people when we realize that the person we are at this very moment is special, is enough, and is worthy of love, compassion, and greatness. What do you love about you?
Growth- As human beings we are geared toward personal growth. Putting yourself out there by means of education, networking, or trying new things are great ways to do so. I challenge you to start the growth process by enhancing your inner self. Yes, I’m about to go on another inner dialogue rant. It is oh so important! Returning back to the topic of dumping on ourselves, saying that you should be doing something is ineffective and produces more anxiety and guilt than anything else. What to do instead you ask? Well, saying that you will do something is a great alternative. The word “will” is made up of key properties and nutrients for the soul (ie. hope, motivation) that will help keep the constant should-ing at bay. When does your endless should-ing start to flare up?
My dear readers, if you walk away with nothing else, know that Should-ing is a waste. Let’s work hard to keep the waste where it belongs
Have a gloriously good Good Friday!