Grief can have a quality of profound healing because we are forced to a depth of feeling that is usually below the threshold of awareness. Though many of our motivations come from this level of fear, of loss, yet we don’t know where these volitions originate. We simply find ourselves lost in action, in anger or fear, pushing away others, grasping at what we imagined to be our safety, constantly guarding our heart.
This tearing open of the heart leaves us exposed to that which has caused us and our loved ones the pain of imagined separateness so often before. This experience of discovery that grief leads us to is, for some, like going below ground level to look at the roots of a tree whose branches and twigs, leaves and flowers were all you thought were meaningful.
It is the tree of life, of your life… ~ Stephen Levine
I’ve said it on here many times…grief is the most emotionally difficult experience a person can have. Yet, it is also can be a time of great healing, of great change and of growth. That is, if you allow the grief to run its course, to be gentle with yourself in the process and allow it to bring you where you need to go.
Pushing away the great pain is human but if you know that in the pain is great hope, is great learning, is the opportunity for a great life, you will go through easier and come out wiser.
Even on the most horribly painful days, remember that if you allow you your grief and allow you your learning and BE GOOD to yourself during this time…and INSIST that others be good to you as well, you will come out stronger, better, wiser and more self-aware.
Use pain wisely…otherwise there is no reason for it and suffering for suffering sakes is never a good state of things. Be gentle, be good, be knowing. It will lead you to great things inside you. Trust that it will.