Sex tips can get boring – there’s only so many things you can do. If you feel like you and your partner have tried them all and are ready for something new, it can be difficult to discover another technique that you haven’t already done before. But what if you found a new trigger? An actual area of the female anatomy that has never been focused on before and will give her amazing orgasms? Meet the U-spot.
Generally, when you’re referring to the U-spot, you’re actually referring to the Skene’s gland. This gland sits very close to a woman’s urethra and when stimulated, it produces copious amounts of female ejaculate – also known as squirting . This area is above the vaginal opening, but below the clitoris and slightly below the urethra.
The U-spot is extremely sensitive. Most of the time, it is indirectly stimulated during sex or oral sex, and rightly so – it’s so sensitive that the wrong touch could really be uncomfortable and turn a woman completely off. It’s really easy to go overboard when touching this area, so make sure your partner is well lubed and your touch is very, very gentle.
You can touch and rub this area with your fingers, provided that your partner is already aroused and very lubed up. If she’s not wet enough for you to use her vaginal secretions to wet your fingers, make sure you have a good, water or silicone based lube on hand. Touching this area without lube is going to be terribly uncomfortable or painful for her!
Slide your finger down past your lover’s clitoris, stopping just underneath it. Your finger should be resting just above the opening to the vagina . Move the tip of your finger in small, circular motions, being very careful not to rub or press too hard.
You can also stimulate the U-spot with your tongue during oral sex , which is actually a lot more comfortable and pleasurable for a woman. The tongue is wet and soft, so there’s less of a chance that you’ll rub her the wrong way. Again, slide your tongue past her clitoris and let it rest above the vaginal opening, moving it in small circles or back and forth. Switch between doing this and licking her clitoris to drive her absolutely wild!
As with trying anything new during sex, it’s important to communicate with your partner and read their body language to tell if something that you’re doing is pleasurable to them or if you’re actually making them uncomfortable. While your lover might just tell you out loud that you’re doing it the wrong way, some women aren’t that outspoken about what they like and what they don’t like.
That’s why learning to read your lover’s body language is so important! If she doesn’t like what you’re doing, she’s going to pull away or avoid making any pleasurable sounds. If you’re in the dark though and you’re just not sure if she’s liking your moves, don’t be afraid to ask her if it’s good for her. If she seems like she’s not into it or if she tells you so, move on to a different technique.
When you’re stimulating the U-spot the right way, your lover may feel the need to urinate. This is actually a good precursor to female ejaculation , so this may tell you that you’re on the right track. However, it’s always a good idea to make sure your partner uses the bathroom before getting started, so she can be reasonably confident that the sensation of having to pee is actually a pleasurable sensation of being on the verge of squirting.
Your lover isn’t going to find having her U-spot touched and fondled very pleasurable if she’s not relaxed first. It may be helpful to draw her a warm bath first, or take a shower together. Help her do whatever she needs to relax and get her mind off of the stresses of the day. Also, remember to have fun with it. Trying something new is supposed to be fun – so don’t get bent out of shape if it doesn’t work the first time or you’re unable to give your partner an orgasm this way. You can always try again later, in a slightly different way. Experiment with different techniques and enjoy the process!