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Overcoming Pornography Addiction Part 2

Posted Jul 07 2008 7:16pm
This is the third and final post in a series onovercoming pornography addiction. Luke Gilkerson is the community manager for Covenant Eyes.



In my last post I asked the addict several pressing questions. What do you yearn for—really yearn for? What is pornography medicating and distracting you from? Why are we so screwed up?

As a recovering addict, I am still hit hard with these questions. At one time, I was out of control, plain and simple. I wanted to know why I was out of control and what could be done about it.

Often just facing these questions is a daunting task. Asking them means we're looking past the addiction and looking to its root causes, the sin beneath the sin. But this is where finding support from other people is vital.

Counseling

Professional counselors are an incredible gift to the world. Our hearts are like deep oceans of experiences, memories, agendas, and twisted beliefs. “A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water, but a man of understanding draws it out” (Proverbs 20:5). Good professional counselors are skilled persons of understanding. They can come alongside the addict and draw out the deep and hidden issues.

For many, a professional counselor can be a great step to unearth hidden sins and root problems—and I would highly recommend it for the porn addict—but the church must be cautious it doesn't play the referral game all the time. Part of the reason why counselor's offices are flood with Christian people is because many leaders of the church have backed out of their responsibility to teach and lead others the way Jesus did.

This is where the community of the church comes in.

Community

The addict must be nurtured in a community. There you can live out the incredible promise of James 5:16, to love each other through mutual confession of sins and prayer, and thus find real healing. Enter into a small group that has a vision for this sort of community. I strongly recommend that the addict find a community with age and experience diversity. It can be a very powerful thing to have a multi-generational group getting together with one another regularly.

Covenant Eyes

Live out Job 31:1, “I have made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.” I recommend the following steps:

1. Get accountability software on your computer. Covenant Eyes accountability program (www.CovenantEyes.com) will monitor all of your Internet use and send detailed reports to accountability partners of your choosing. This has helped thousands of people begin the process of recovery by helping them take their sin out of the dark of secrecy and into the light of a community.

2. Join or start a “covenant community.” Find others who struggle, who have struggled, and others with some years and maturity under their belt and begin a covenant community. As a part of that community, have everyone download the accountability software and share your reports with one another on a regular basis.

3. Collectively make a covenant with your eyes. Deepen your obedience to God: don't simply stop with a clean accountability report. The goal is not just not looking at porn. The goal is to use your eyes in a God-honoring manner. Help one another to see deeper sins beneath the surface addictions. Make it your goal to help one another to grow in love.

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