Happy Relationships: How To Replace Fear And Doubt With Gratitude, Love and Trust
Posted Sep 22 2008 10:27am
As human beings, we operate daily reflecting a wide range of emotions with a multitude of motivations fueling our behaviors.
All too often, we react emotionally to what others say or do. If our reactions are preceded by the emotions of fear, anger, or sadness, we forfeit our ability to act with personal power and effectiveness in lieu of a knee-jerk response.
The emotional reaction
This reaction is all too often sourced in fear and low self-esteem. We may focus on what’s wrong with us and our lives, fear being controlled, hurt, or taken advantage of.
We may overlook the many things we have in our lives for which we should rightly be grateful, doubt our ability to thrive and access the abundance we see all around us in the world, reacting instead from the concern of scarcity and the expectation of failure, hurt, and disappointment.
We may see ourselves in competition for the world’s resources and the love and attention of others rather than realizing that there is more than enough of all that is good to go around. We forget that we manifest what we expect rather than needing to compete for limited resources.
Whenever we forget that we are magnificent beings and that there is plenty of wealth, happiness, fun, and fulfillment to go around, we might feel the need to protect ourselves from what we perceive to be a dangerous world. We likewise tend to forget that others operate from the same lacking self-confidence, scarcity of gratitude, and deficient self-love that we often do.
The result of not seeing ourselves as good enough
So, whenever two or more individuals see themselves as not good enough to tap into the world’s abundance and get all their needs met from a physical, social, mental, and emotional perspective, conflicts are likely to arise.
The result is broken relationships, strained communication, emotional pain, struggle, and suffering. All of these are needless and optional for those who realize their ability to detach from the struggle and master their emotional response.
When we stop to realize that everyone else suffers from the same self-doubt and fear of being dominated and cheated out of getting their fair share of love, fun, money, possessions, and security, we can break the vicious cycle of endless competition and continual striving for domination.
Breaking the cycle
We can realize that cooperation and communication is more effective in producing harmony than competition and a focus on self-interest based on fear.
We can intentionally choose to trust that others are doing the best they know how to do based upon how they see the world. We can assume that they act from good intentions, even when we fear the opposite.