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Glass half full or empty?

Posted Sep 07 2008 2:18am

On a first date, a man asked if I was a glass-half-full or half-empty kind of gal. Although a tad trite, no one else had asked directly if I was optimistic or pessimistic. I wondered who would admit to the latter, although I know some are attracted to others who share a negative world view.

I am drawn to positive people, those who aren’t stopped by obstacles, but look for ways around them. People who don’t focus on what’s missing as long as what is present brings you satisfaction.

My friend, the outstanding motivational speaker W Mitchell was in a blazing motorcycle accident, leaving him with devastating burns over 65% of his body. Four years later he survived a paralyzing plane crash.

He learned to choose to look at the positives in life rather than the negatives. In his speeches, he says, “Before the accidents, I could do 10,000 things. Now I can do 9000. I can bemoan the 1000 I can’t do now, or I can relish the 9000.” Mitchell definitely sees the glass half full.

I dated a man for months who focused on the few things we didn’t enjoy together, rather than the dozens of things we did. I can understand if your love doesn’t like to do things that are important to you — things that are critical to your enjoying life. But if your sweetie likes to do lots of what you like to do, then why focus on the few things you don’t share a love for? This man was a half-empty kind of guy.

Which are you — half-empty or half-full? Why? And if you’re like me — mostly half-full although there are some things that I absolutely must have in my life — what won’t you compromise, no matter how many things you have in common?

Got a topic on dating after 40 you want Dating Goddess to address? Send your issue to Goddess@DatingGoddess.com.

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