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For new readers, I post links fo...

Posted Sep 28 2008 6:07pm

For new readers, I post links for the top posts of the last 30 days and occasionally run a post for Top Posts of All Time though many of these are on both lists. For this month’s edition, I’ve done both.

I’ve hyperlinked the recent posts and followed it with a non-hyper linked list of top posts of all time. To find the non-hyperlinked posts, just put some of the title in the search box to the right or the search box up top. If you have trouble finding a post, send me email.

The linked posts are the top posts for the last 30 days with the exception of the Check-in Threads which tend to be popular because they’re current. Some of the posts take a while to load because of the amount of comments. Read the comments too! Our readers are brilliant. :) And if you comment on an older post, chances are someone will answer you. Some of these threads, even though written a while ago, are still very current.


Top Posts of the Past 30 Days (hyperlinked)
After the breakup
The Emotions of Grief During A Breakup
More “After the Breakup”
Tales from Breaking NC
Personality Disorders With A Special Nod to Narcissism
Does Anybody Miss Me?
Honoring The End
The Post-Breakup No-No List
The Healing Power of Grief
More on the Urge To Connect With The Ex
Taking Back Your Power
Addicted to Drama. Soundtrack Included
On Choosing To Change
12/29 TFTD ~ When The Person You Love Do 7
More On Standards
Life’s Lessons from the Dalai Lama
Share Your D-Bom Moments
5/4 TFTD ~ On Closure
Unequivocally Dumped
The Abusive and Semi-Abusive Relationshi
1/14 TFTD ~ How Do I Stop?
Being Good To Yourself
Grief Work / Therapy
I Matter
On Deciding To Move On
Top Posts of All Time current as of May 23, 2008
1. Getting Past Your Breakup
2. The Emotions of Grief During A Breakup
3. More “Getting Past Your Breakup”
4. The Post-Breakup No-No List
5. 12/29 TFTD ~ When The Person You Love Do
6. More on the Urge To Connect With The Ex
7. Letting Go: The Relationship Inventory
8. On Being Friends With The Ex
9. The Last Phase of Grief: Acceptance, R
10. 1/7 TFTD ~ On Real Love
11. The Abusive and Semi-Abusive Relationship
12. 5/4 TFTD ~ On Closure
13. Unequivocally Dumped
14. Personality Disorders–with a special no
15. 7/3 TFTD ~ More on “No Contact”
16. “I’m not getting over it”
17. Does Anybody Miss Me?
18. 1/14 TFTD ~ How Do I Stop?
19. Have Your “Built In Forgetter” Removed
20. 5/5 TFTD ~ On Fear
21. Tales from Breaking NC
22. 6/23 TFTD ~ On The (Not So) Secret
23. Mourning Theory
24. 3/2 TFTD ~ On Trust
25. On Deciding To Move On III
26. TFTD 2/17 ~ On Betrayal
27. 8/8 TFTD ~ On Accepting Your Partner
28. Being Unavailable v. Playing A Game
29. 11/23 TFTD ~ On Narcissism
30. Is (Was) Your Relationship Good For You?
31. 7/5 TFTD ~ Living Well Is The Best Revenge
32. Grief Recycling
33. 9/26 TFTD ~ On Self Soothing
34. 9/19 TFTD ~ More On Rejection
35. Loving Yourself / Being Good To You
36. 10/7 TFTD ~ Forgiveness and Amends
37. Honoring the End
38. You’re Not Who I Thought You Were
39. 1/12 TFTD - On Attraction
40. Relationships and Intimacy
41. Good People Are Not Doormats
42. 8/12 TFTD ~ More On Real Love
43. Mail. We Get Mail on Being Replaced
44. 9/3 TFTD ~ On Being A Victim
45. Don’t Give Up The Day Before The Miracle
46. Obsession
47. 2/2 TFTD ~ More On Unresolved Grief
48. 12/28 TFTD ~ On Defense Mechanisms
49. 1/19 TFTD ~ More On Transformation
50. 9/25 TFTD ~ On Triangulation
51. 2/3 TFTD ~ Sometimes It’s Just Not “It”
52. 8/10 TFTD ~ On Self-Discovery
53. Trust the Process
54. 2/27 TFTD ~ On Being The Identified Patient
55. On Children and Breakups
56. The Definitive Guide to Contact / No Contact
57. 3/25 TFTD ~ On Being Alone
58. 12/27 TFTD - Courage to Heal
59. Who’s The Sicker Person Here?
60. Being Friends With the Ex Redux
61. The Nonsense Zone
62. 1/5 TFTD ~ On Healthy Communications
63. Red Flags: Can You Leave At The First S
64. Grief, Self-Pity and Depression
65. Water seeks its own level
66. Being Unavailable v. Playing a Game 2
67. MySpace Drama
68. 9/23 TFTD ~ More On Blame
69. When Do You Know You’re Ready To Date Ag
70. 3/20 TFTD ~ Infidelity: Not on the List
71. Gentle NC Reminders
72. When You Absolutely Positively Have To S
73. If I Pay You, Will You Love Me?
74. 4/27 TFTD ~ On Uncertainty
75. The Platitude Hall of Fame
76. Obsessive “Love” (really just obsession)
77. 6/14 TFTD ~ More on Letting Go
78. 9/30 TFTD ~ Guilt as an Anchor to a Bad
79. 8/7 TFTD ~ On Losing Oneself to A Relati
80. 2/12 TFTD ~ On Deciding To Move On
81. The Healing Power of Grief
82. Music To Get Empowered By
83. 12/27 Act As If
84. 10/6 TFTD ~ More on Boundaries
85. 11/2/07 TFTD ~ On Stopping the Pain
86. Can People Change?
87. 1/20 TFTD - On Being Okay With Yourself
88. The Life Inventory
89. Karma
90. Putting the Inventories to Work
91. Healthy Dating Take III
92. 4/3 TFTD ~ On Splitting
93. Love Is An Action. Period.
94. MySpace Drama Redux
95. 1/20 TFTD ~ On Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda
96. 4/22 TFTD ~ On People Pleasing
97. 2/10 TFTD ~ On Change
98. NC Chips
99. 9/21 TFTD ~ More On Loss
100. 12/13 TFTD ~ On Friendship
101. Courage to Change II
102. 12/2 TFTD ~ More On the Gift of Desperation
103. 9/18 TFTD ~ On Ambivalence
104. 10/14 TFTD ~ Why Are They So Much Better
105. 8/22 TFTD ~ “But S/he Loves Me”
106. Mail. We Get Mail. End of March
107. Building A Life Of One’s Own
108. Change through grief
109. 9/23 TFTD ~ More On Trust
110. 2/22 TFTD ~ Nature Abhors A Vacuum
111. 10/26 TFTD ~ On Positive Self-Talk and R
112. 12/24 TFTD ~ More On Boundaries
113. To Be The Right Person I — My Take
114. 5/20 TFTD ~ More On Courage and Facing Y
115. On Being The Black Sheep
116. 12/26 Mail. We Get Mail. From Angry People
117. 1/1 TFTD ~ Being Prepared for Outcomes
118. Mail. We Get Mail When The Exes Are Selfish Children
119. Questions II
120. Oh That Google
121. Mail. We Get Mail (November)
122. Can you hear me now?
123. Taking Back Your Power
124. 7/6 TFTD ~ On Choosing Your Destiny
125. 1/2 TFTD ~ On Healthy Dating
126. Mail…We Get Mail (September)
127. Blaming the Other
128. TFTD 5/07/08 ~ Choosing To Change
129. 1/23 TFTD ~ More on Standards
130. 7/1 TFTD ~ Accept It, Change It, or Leav
131. 7/28 TFTD ~ On Exile From A Dysfunctiona
132. 8/28 TFTD ~ On Repeating Unhealthy Patte
133. What Does This Look Like?
134. Let’s Play “Where Are Your Boundaries?”
135. Progress Not Perfection II
136. On Getting Through The Holidays
137. Are You Depressed?
138. 9/17 TFTD ~ More On Choices
139. Moving Past Grief and Loss Lecture NYC 5
140. Ya Gotta Be Numero Uno or None at All
141. NC Chips March
142. 11/13 TFTD ~ On Self-Delusions
143. 2/15 TFTD ~ More on Grief versus Self-Pi
144. What Is Not (yet) In Front of You
145. When Can I Trust Someone Again?
146. 3/27 TFTD ~ Self-Knowledge Through Pain
147. On Being A Person of Dignity
148. 3/11 TFTD ~ On Burning Bridges and Blami
149. Boundaries Revisited
150. 2/13 TFTD ~ Alone on Valentine’s Day
151. The Switch Off…or not.
152. Red Flag Redux
153. 1/22 TFTD ~ On Love and Respect
154. 9/13 TFTD ~ More on Living Well
155. 2/16 TFTD ~ More on Journaling
156. 10 Tips for Healthy Dating
157. 5/24 TFTD ~ On Recovering from Dysfuncti
158. Share Your D-BOM Moments
159. 2/9 TFTD ~ Making Peace with the Peace I
160. 7/14 TFTD ~ On Self-Responsibility…our
161. 12/19 TFTD ~ On “I Want You Back for Rev
162. 12/19 TFTD - On Rising Up From the Ashes
163. From the “Too Bad So Sad” Mailbag
164. How Hard Do You Want To Work?
165. Addicted to the Drama (Soundtrack Includ
166. Do You Still Love Me Redux
167. Recycling Recycled
168. Grief Work / Therapy
169. Being Good to Yourself
170. Shoulda Woulda Coulda II
171. To Be The Right Person. Reader Thoughts
172. Communicating with the ex
173. More From the Questions? Post
174. Addicted to Drama (Soundtrack Included)
175. 1/24 TFTD ~ On Acceptance
176. 10/2 TFTD ~ On Recycling
177. On Self Knowledge Through Pain
178. Today’s Misconception
179. 10/28 TFTD ~ On Commitmentphobia
180. 4/7 ~ On Responsibility
181. 6/19 TFTD ~ Progress Not Perfection
182. 2/1 TFTD ~ The Power of Twenty One
183. Moving On Success
184. “I Matter” II
185. Do You Still Love Me?
186. 11/29 TFTD - On Identity
187. CyberCheating and You
188. 9/1 TFTD ~ More On Standards
189. 2/10 TFTD ~ More On Balance
190. 1/26 Mail. We Get Mail.
191. 12/3 TFTD ~ The Big Lebowski I’m Not–So
192. 1/21 TFTD ~ More on Journaling
193. 9/2 TFTD ~ On Emotional Pain
194. Life’s Lessons from the Dalai Lama
195. Self-Assessment
196. Mother’s Day When Mom Was Not Such a Pea
197. 1/11 TFTD ~ You Get It When You Get It
198. 12/18 ~ On Depression and Boundaries
199. Book Review Thread
200. 1/10 TFTD ~ More on Making Peace with th
201. 8/23 TFTD ~ Dejection: An Ode
202. Mail. We Get Mail. On “The Dark Side”
203. 12/21 TFTD ~ Holidays and me-all year ro
204. 12/23 TFTD - On Standards
205. Age Difference: Sometimes it’s more tha
206. You Complete Me: Houston We Have A Prob
207. 3/10 TFTD ~ More on Choosing to Change
208. From the Mailbag: Enabling and Why It’s
209. 12/5 TFTD - On Frames of Reference
210. Sex, Lies and Governorship
211. Remaining Friends Pointer
212. More on People Pleasing
213. 2/26 TFTD ~ More on Grief and Loss
214. Platitude Hall of Fame II
215. More on Learning How….
216. 12/6 TFTD ~ You’re Healthy Til You’re No
217. 12/13 TFTD - On Dysfunctional Relationsh
218. What You Think of Me Is None of My Busin
219. On Stepping Out of the Dance Redux
220. 12/21 TFTD - On post-breakup holidays
221. 4/13 TFTD ~ These Thin Lines
222. 1/27 TFTD ~ On Self-Responsibility
223. 1/16 TFTD - On Expressing Grief
224. Feb: Mail We Get Mail on All Kinds of T
225. The Fools of April Edition
226. 10/23 TFTD ~ On The Danger of Multitaski
227. Returning the Things
228. Mail. We Get Mail. When They Just Up a
229. 11/18 TFTD ~ On Being Thankful
230. 12/30 TFTD - On Self-Respect
231. 7/10 TFTD ~ On Loving Ourselves
232. Closure Redux
233. A Few From the Questions? Post
234. Mail. We Get Mail on Relationships with
235. 4/24 TFTD ~ On Grief and Self-Pity
236. 3/17 TFTD ~ On Trying to Please Others
237. 7/25 TFTD ~ More On Self Restraint
238. Acting Out
239. 5/12 TFTD ~ On Failure and Not Trying
240. 3/30 TFTD ~ More on Transformation
241. The V Word
242. 3/12 TFTD ~ More on Boundaries
243. 12/16 ~ On Grieving for Places and What
244. 3/20 TFTD ~ On Courage
245. Healing
246. 7/15 TFTD ~ On Getting Past The Past
247. On Growing Your Own Garden
248. 2/13 TFTD ~ On Keeping a Positive Attitu
249. Reader Mail on Dating / Not Dating
250. 6/9 TFTD ~ Grief as the healing feeling
251. 10/20 ~ On Family Systems Part I
252. 12/31 TFTD - On Resilience
253. 10/13 TFTD ~ Anger and Sadness
254. Standards Again
255. 6/21 TFTD ~ On Searching
256. Mail. We Get Mail. On Divorce.
257. 1/1 TFTD ~ On Resolutions
258. Visualization
259. 11/6 TFTD ~ On Bittersweet
260. 12/25 TFTD - On the gift of desperation
261. 4/20 TFTD ~ On Revealing Self to Others
262. Healthy Dating Take IV
263. 3/4 TFTD ~ More On Dancing Out of Contro
264. Eggs
265. 2/19 TFTD ~ On Wanting More
266. 10/15 Mail We Get Mail
267. 11/3 Mail. We Get Mail on Self-Esteem
268. 8/29 On Being Your Own Therapist
269. Reconnection
270. 5/6 TFTD ~ On “My Type”
271. 11/11 TFTD ~ On Enabling
272. 3/21 TFTD ~ On Learning
273. Quiet on the Western Front
274. 5/19 TFTD ~ On Difficult People
275. 3/7 TFTD ~ On Finishing Unfinished Busin
276. Therapists and Clients on the Blog
277. Personal Power
278. 7/19 TFTD ~ On Experience
279. 2/21 TFTD ~ On Feeling “Less Than”
280. 9/9 TFTD ~ On Fidelity
281. GPYP cheat sheet to self-confidence
282. Intergenerational Unfinished Business
283. 6/24 TFTD ~ On “Plan B”
284. Rejecting Rejection
285. Gratitude Journaling
286. Mail. We Get Mail. Late November
287. 3/31 TFTD ~ On Optimism
288. 7/12 TFTD ~ More on “Act As If”
289. 7/30 TFTD ~ On Having Class
290. A Few More From the Questions? Post
291. 3/5/08 TFTD ~ Goals Revisited
292. 3/22 TFTD ~ On Running Away
293. 5/25 TFTD ~ On Introspection
294. 4/30 TFTD ~ On Instinct
295. 2/6 TFTD ~ V-day series 1
296. 2/15 TFTD ~ On Rebuilding
297. Thoughts and Pix from 3/8 Seminar
298. Odd Moments in New York City
299. 7/23 TFTD ~ On Self-Doubt
300. 1/17 TFTD ~ Going Downhill. Fast.
301. 1/13 TFTD - Consider the Source
302. 5/22 TFTD ~ On Being Good To Yourself
303. The Questions? Post III (I think)
304. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays
305. On Facing Your Fear
306. 1/27 TFTD ~ Real Love is Work
307. Boundaries
308. Love is what you do
309. 6/13 TFTD ~ Change is Difficult (but Wor
310. Mail. We Get Mail
311. 12/29 TFTD More on Love is What You Do
312. 11/17 TFTD ~ More On Decisions
313. Comments We Get Comments
314. Another Milestone
315. 1/4 TFTD - On “I Matter”
316. 3/14 TFTD ~On Pain and Possibility
317. 1/8 TFTD - On Believing in Dreams
318. Strain? Pull back before it’s a break
319. 10/27 ~ TFTD Christmas on Halloween
320. 1/5 TFTD - Gratitude is An Action
321. 12/17 ~ Mail. We Get More Mail on Frien
322. Now For Something Completely Silly
323. More on Enabling
324. On Using Tools As Weapons
325. 2/18 TFTD ~ On Following Your Own Path
326. GPYB Book Deal Reported in Publisher’s M
327. 2/11 TFTD ~ On Communications
328. 2/23 TFTD ~ On Thinking, Saying and Doin
329. April: Top Posts
330. 8/27 TFTD ~ On Self-Blame and Self-Love
331. ACT and GPYP
332. 10/24 TFTD ~ On Confrontation
333. What If You Had Six Months To Live?
334. Enabling Village
335. 6/12 TFTD ~ More On Fear
336. 5/12 Mail, We Get Mail
337. 12/22 TFTD - Cycles
338. TFTD 6/15 ~ On Connection
339. 9/4 TFTD ~ On Renewal
340. 11/30 TFTD - On Our True Selves
341. 6/11 TFTD ~ On Knowing What You Stand Fo
342. 6/22 TFTD ~ On Being Different After A L
343. Goals
344. 3/6 TFTD ~ More On Control
345. On Vacuous Personalities
346. 3/3 TFTD ~ On Starting A Program of Cha
347. 11/29 Happy Birthday Blog!
348. 5/10 TFTD ~ On Journaling
349. 4/17 TFTD ~ More on Grief and Loss
350. 2/6 TFTD ~ More on Real Love
351. Daring To Change
352. 1/17 TFTD - On Excuses
353. On Stepping Out of The Dance
354. Another Post for New Readers
355. 12/18 TFTD - On Becoming Who We Are
356. 1/28 TFTD ~ On Nurturing
357. 12/26 TFTD - Resolving to Change
358. 7/7 TFTD ~ On Having A Full Life
359. 4/23 TFTD ~ More On Goals
360. Answers to the Questions? post
361. 12/18 TFTD ~ On Being In The Middle
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