And by ID, I mean Inner Dialogue, or the internal conversations that we have with ourselves from day to day. Unfortunately girls, today's post is not about how to generate a phenomenal government-issued identification picture. That, my friends, is a feat far beyond PSG's capabilities ;)
From our very early years, we have all talked to ourselves. Whether you’re shopping, watching a show, reading, or talking with friends, our self-talk often comes into play. It is a huge part of self-awareness and it has an affect not only ourselves, but on how we relate and interact with the world around us. We are constantly commenting on things that we see, making judgments on people, events, and experiences. Inner dialogue (ID) is a great way to kickoff the journey towards self-awareness, as it is also directly related to our self-image. Inner dialogue is necessary and can help us tremendously. Examples
"He’s cute. Think I’ll give him a li’l smile."
"I shouldn’t buy those shoes because I need to pay the rent."
"It must be hard carrying a stroller up the subway steps, I think I’ll help her."
"That man in the alley looks quite agitated, perhaps I should detour down a more
Some inner dialogue, however, can be harmful. As stated in a previous entry ( http://www.psychandthesinglegirl.com/2011/01/psg-declares-self-awareness-is-new.html ), our self-image unconsciously prescribes our limits and abilities. Having a poor self-image often means that we have poor inner dialogue, which in turn only functions to worsen an already damaged sense of self. The result: perceived limitations. The "what if(s)", "I can't(s)", and "I don't deserve(s)" over shadow the goal oriented thoughts and motivations that wander through the mind. We have all experienced negative inner dialogue on more than one occasion during our lives. So what’s the best medicine? Many heaping spoonfuls of positive inner dialogue.
How do we go about initiating more positive IDs? First off, let’s think of driving a car. If your inner dialogue is constantly negative, then IT is the driver and YOU are the car. IT controls YOUR progression, where you go, and what you do. Constant negative inner dialogue causes us to react to our circumstances instead of taking action. We end up holding back from pursuing dreams, we get into petty fights, and we prevent ourselves from putting the best foot forward. On the flip side, generating positive inner dialogue puts YOU in the driver’s seat and YOU control the direction and progression of your thoughts (and therefore your actions). A car is a powerful machine, and so are your thoughts. Take control over that machine and you will harness a great power. The positive inner dialogue that results gives us the strength and motivation to take action and do the things that we want to do.
Take control of your thoughts and generate positive IDs by using what PSG likes to call C.H.A.A.R.M.
C- Cancel the negative thought- (Sometimes saying the word "cancel" out loud helps.) Stop it in its tracks, before it goes any further. H- Have a laugh- No need to take things so seriously all of the time. A- Arm yourself with positive beliefs A- Affirm your positive beliefs to yourself regularly R- RELAX
M-Make an effort- Set a small goal for yourself and give it your best shot!
Sounds simple right? Well it is, but it’s not necessarily easy. As with many new endeavors, it takes practice. So, let’s get to work. 1…2…3…go!