Day 3 of my 30 day challenge to write… Duck Duck goose…you’re it!
Posted Jun 23 2010 10:20am
Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo. – Ambrose Bierce
My dear, dear ladies…we are Queens of hypocrisy. Our crown? A halo of prejudice.
Prejudice against men. Men prejudice against women.
I hear women complain all the time about the games men play…
I hear men complain all the time about the games women play…
Let’s face it…we all play them. Games are a necessary component in relations of any kind. In some skewed way of looking at it…games give validation where validation is needed most. If you are in it enough to play, then there is a chance you just might be in it enough to win. In a way you acknowledge the person is worth your effort in the first place.
The rules are as individual as snowflakes; different for each person.
How often do you reach out? When should you call? How long should you wait? When do you give up? When do you persist? Do you call first? How fast should you respond?
One person’s “too much” is another person’s “not enough”.
It is the perpetual duck duck goose of romance.
What gets on my nerves about my species…is a woman will throw herself in the game without giving a damn about learning the game. All the while playing coy saying she doesn’t play games.
And, just like in elementary school when a girl is pushing a guy over and over and he pushes back finally and she cries like a school girl because she can’t believe he just pushed her…that kind of behavior makes me want to punch a girl.
Do men play games? Yes, they do. But, here’s the thing. Women play the game of acting like they are not aware the man is playing games…women manipulate to always bend themselves like a game of twister… always landing in the position of the victim.
Common sense makes it obvious that if a man is playing games at the beginning he is either wanting to hookup or fill time…a man will always play games but, will never play them hard enough to lose if he is truly wanting to win. Hello!!!
If women would admit to themselves this simple truth, and make their choice to play with full knowledge of the consequences or sit it out because of full knowledge of the consequences…well, they would then find themselves enjoying the process.
Let’s take me for instance. When I am into a guy, I put it out there. I tell it like I feel it. Now, in a sense…I am playing a game…because I know that the kind of guy I want to give my time to is a guy who won’t be turned off by that. That is the first move in my game…I recognize this. If a guy shows the moxie to get past it and not be intimidated…then he gets the prize;) which is realizing right when he thinks he has me figured out…he finds layer upon complex layer to uncover.
Either way, although he may feel he is in control because I am being open and upfront…I am aware I am like an iceberg…what I am showing is just the tip…and if you look beneath the surface…you will see just how deep I go. But, I am also not afraid to look at myself and say yeah…that is probably game playing…innocent enough.
I say this to show we all have a game. Every one of us. And to say you don’t? Hypocrisy…
I can hear it now…the valiant men saying, “ I don’t play games”. The fact that you say you don’t is playing a game. Your game is being the ‘good guy’ that puts it all ‘out there’ because you feel being like that will get you the end result you are looking for.
Break it down; the natural psychology of human communication. It is always for an end result…always pointing back to the self. So, to say you are free of game playing…well, you would have to be six feet under.
Part of the evolution of a soul is growing enough to start to let go of your own game…when it comes to communicating or being transparent and genuine. But, most of us on this planet are not 100% there yet. That is part of being human. Right? In a sense, we will always communicate through a game filter at the beginning. It is part of having an ego.
I tell women all the time…just swallow the fact that most men and women play games. Swallow it like medicine. It is medicine. It is the beginning of getting real.
As long as you remember the one golden rule standard in every relationship: a man will always play games but, will never play them hard enough to lose what he is truly wanting to win.
Take responsibility girls…If you play, don’t whine or cry when you get a scuffed heart…or a kick in the ego…
Go into it with open eyes and an open heart…if you look at it in this way, you will have fun while finding out if the man you are on the field of the heart with will be game, set, match.
Last game. Last set. Match point. The game is over…either you shake hands and walk away separate…or you pat each other on the butt and say good game;)…walking off together…content with the outcome and the effort put forth to play. Both of you winners because you stuck it out and gave it your all.
Just have fun with it…all is fair in love and war;)