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Dating Tips: How To Make The First Approach

Posted May 09 2011 10:00am

Dating starts when you first go up to a woman – but the way you do it can be crucial to how far you can go with her. Here’s how to make the initial introduction perfect.

So maybe you are out running an every day errand, maybe you are getting some drinks at a bar or club, either way, all you know is that you are going a long with your business and like a fly to a neon light, you see some girl that completely captures your attention. All you want is to be able to go up and talk to her, flirt with her, sweep her off her feet, and walk out with her.

However for some, this task simply remains an idea while they sit idly and watch the girl they admire walk away, many times to never be seen again. Well if one can apply the simple concepts presented in this article, difficulty making an introduction will become a thing of the past.

First thing you need to understand is that the girl will almost never make an introduction on you, per say. What I mean is that it is extremely rare that any girl will go out of her way, go up to you, and initiate the conversation , I don’t care how good looking you are, it almost never happens so get that idea out of your head and never wait around for it. Girls do however go out of their way to make themselves readily available for your introduction.

This is because it is your job, as the man, to go up, pick the girl you want, and initiate the conversation. It is your right as a man; never forget this. There is nothing socially wrong with it, if anything it is expected of you.

So the key to a successful first introduction is identifying what kind of girls want to be approached. Often times, it goes wrong for a guy it is because they are waiting around too long, missing opportunities the girl presents, or simply introduce yourself girls that are not currently open to flirting . So the step is identifying the two major things that a girl will do to open herself to your introduction.

Eye Contact

This is by far the most important window that a girl can present to you for you to open. Think about what its like when you walk through a busy street. As you walk on your way, there are naturally people that just catch your eye, sometimes it is a pretty girl, other times it is just someone in your vicinity, point is subconsciously your mind works to make yourself aware of your surroundings. We do this by making brief eye contact with the people around us and girls do the same exact thing.

If you are out and about and you happen to notice a girl look in your direction and you make eye contact with her, even for just a brief second, consider that your push in the butt to go up and talk to her. Because she has recognized you in her surroundings/subconscious, she will not be startled and taken aback by your introduction, in fact about 80% of the time girls make eye contact with a guy is because they found something about them attractive in one way. Think of it like an 80% chance that the dating will go well.

Proximity

Meaning that the girl is in your vicinity. Think of it like this, you are at bar or club and you see a girl you like within her group of friends. Her actions may show that she is in fact very open to being approached, regardless if they are on purpose or subconscious. If you notice the girl standing within a 10 foot radius of yourself for more than 3 mins, she has processed you in her surroundings and will be much more susceptible to an introduction. If you notice her walking by you on more than one occasion, you sure as hell better make an introduction. And lastly if you are noticing her facing you within her group or wherever she may be, she is opening herself to be approached by you.

Combining eye contact and proximity will make the dating go smoothly, especially if you can combine it with this very simple formula for introducing yourself to a girl you find attractive.

Now what I am about to share may sound like a pick up line to some but it should not be viewed like that. It should be viewed as a natural response to a women you find attractive. Although sometimes there are opportunities where something clever and situational can be made into an introduction, it is much simpler to have a natural response to women you find attractive so you don’t over think anything.

Walk over. Stop. Make eye contact and say:

“Hey I know this seems random but I think you are really cute and I wanted to come over and introduce myself, my name is ______”

Then stick your hand out for a handshake.

This direct introduction works because it allows her to see your intentions from the start, showing you have a general interest in her, if she engages in the conversation, then she is accepting your interest and you already know from the start it is on. Also by putting your hand out and introducing yourself, it allows for her to accept your introduction and be open to a conversation cause you are just being friendly. It is a natural response to shake hands and introduce yourself to someone you just met so by encouraging her to do so after your introduction.

By saying “I know this seems random” in the beginning, you are also addressing the only real objection a girl has to a stranger approaching them, having it be random, so by saying it you take that fear away. Also if you had got eye contact with her or it had her in your proximity, your introduction will be anything but random.

If you can make this style of introduction your go to move when you have nothing clever to say or are otherwise at a loss for words, you will find that even the most attractive girls open up because you are showing social awareness and genuine interest .

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