Carmin Wharton is
The Relationship Teacher and offers these ‘lessons’ on dating for the single
mom:
Make Your Happiness A Priority:Children who are forced to live with a love sick and miserable mom
are a sad lot.There is absolutely
nothing wrong with a single mother having a love life.Know that you are not to feel guilty
about wanting to spend time in the company of a man.Understand this:your children will not need you as a
hands-on mom forever; they will grow up, develop their own lives and leave
home.Begin now to create and carve
out a life for yourself.Know that
you deserve to be happy and if dating contributes to your happiness, by
all means make dating and/or seeking a mate a priority.
Get out and invest more time in attracting a mate:What do your future relationships look
like?Do you desire a long-term
committed relationship or are you looking for a very casual
relationship?Make sure you carve
time out of your busy schedule to go places and do things where you can be
seen by a potential mate.
Employ friends to help you:If attracting a relationship
is important, then make it a priority. Attend events and place yourself in
situations where you can meet people. Let friends and family know that you
want to date; they just may be the ticket to that dream boat man.
Explore dating sites:Dating sites are just like everything else – there’s good and
there’s bad; there are pros and there are cons.There just may be a single man in your
area who is also sincerely seeking a mate and he just may have decided to
give online dating a try.Guess
what?If you don’t try it, you
might miss meeting him.I would be
remiss if I didn’t warn you to be extremely careful with online
dating.This warning is not for the
reason you may expect.Of course,
you are a smart single mom and you know to use caution in meeting someone
in person; take a friend with you.If you must go alone, make sure at least two people know who and
where you are meeting.Make sure
you meet in a public place.Never
share too much identifying information while you are getting to know
someone online, such as where you specifically live, where you work and
the hours you work.These are
obvious safety tips that most smart women know.However, what most smart women don’t
realize is that it’s very easy to form a superficial relationship via
email, winks and instant messaging.You cannot get to know a man via the Internet; you can only really
get to know him in person and by spending time with him.
Trust your intuition:Whether you meet someone online or in person, if your intuition
–you know that funny feeling in your gut – just doesn’t seem right or
things don’t line up, follow your intuition and break off communication
with them. You don’t need to knowwhythey were not good for you; just trust your intuition.And, don’t be bullied into remaining in
contact with them.Do not allow
desperation and loneliness to blind you to a potential problem person.
Slow it down girl:When you do meet someone you are attracted to, it is much better to
takes things slow and allow something develop.I know it’s tempting to do so, but do not
spend too much time together right away and do not share the intimate
details of your life right away.Some things you should never share; let the past be the past.Refrain from introducing this man to
your family and friends right away.However, don’t wait too long to introduce him because people who
love you can often spot a problem before you can.Wait even longer to introduce him to
your children.You should be well
on your way to feeling or thinking about a long-term relationship before
you introduce him to your children.A monumental mistake in most cases is to have sex with a man soon
in the relationship.Your ‘soon’ may
be different for someone else’s ‘soon’ but you know what I’m talking
about.
Carmin Wharton is The Relationship Teacher and offers these ‘lessons’ on dating for the single mom: