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A Husband and Wife’s Primer for Phone Sex

Posted Dec 08 2008 12:00am

Are you in a situation where you or your spouse travels for extended periods of time or frequently on short trips?  Are you going away for a week or two without them (or they without you)?

Have you ever considered phone sex as a way to connect intimately when you and your spouse are separated by distance?

Phone sex (with mutual masturbation) with your mate can be a fun and satisfying experience.   Here are a few tips for those who may have never done it or feel uncomfortable.

Environment: Ensure you are situated such that others cannot hear your conversation.  If you have call waiting, try to commit to not answering incoming calls during.  Don’t break the mood.  Be physically comfortable.  If possible, use a headset or ear piece so that your hands are free.  Consider playing soft music to create ambiance.

Level 1: Establish a time when he can call you.  Agree on how much time (if necessary) you will spend on the call.  Start the call with general but relevant conversation:

“I’ve been (looking forward to, thinking about, excited about) this call.”
“It’s so good to hear your voice, sexy!”

“So, have you been thinking about me?”

Before kicking up the intensity level, make sure there is a dialog, conversation flowing both ways.

Level 2: Think about the last time you had (good or great) sex.  What actions, feelings, or situation are you picturing?  Describe details.  Paint a picture with your words by talking about what you see, feel, hear, taste(?), and smell from those experiences.  Again, keep the dialog going.  If they are not talking, ask a question.  Possible phrases you are using at this level:

“I was so horny that night (day)! (Describe what you were feeling.)”

“When you__________, my (fill in the blank) got so wet (hard).”

“Your strong (soft) hands on my __________ got me even more excited.

I just wanted to __________.”

“Your (fill in the blank) was so (hard, soft, tight, wet, etc.).  How did it feel to you, baby?”

“Your whole body tensed up and you felt so good inside of (on) me.  How did it feel when you came?”

Level 3: Transition into talking about how you feel at that moment.  Talk about where you are, what you are wearing (or not), and your physical response to the conversation.

“I’m getting horny now!”

“I’m wearing my red crotchless panties.”

“I’m on my stomach with my hands __________.”

“What are you wearing?”

“What are you doing?”

Level 4: Be creative. Tell them what you want to do.   Ask what they want to do to you.  Be as graphic as your comfort level will allow.  Words are not the only audio prompters during phone sex.  Heavy breathing and moaning also communicate.  However, language should be colorful and descriptive.  Think through your ideal scenario during lovemaking with your spouse.  They should do the same.  Describe those scenarios to each other.  While mutually masturbating, describe to each other what you are doing specifically, how it feels, and what you wish were happening.  When you do orgasm, announce and describe the experience.   Have them commit to do the same.  Each of you should be prepared to continue the call until both have climaxed.

Tell your husband or wife you are going to make as much noise as you can to communicate how much you are enjoying yourself.  Invite them to do the same.

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