From lot’s of experience I know that many women struggle with oral sex. A lot of them live under the impression that they are “great” – while in reality, they’re almost clueless. The reason they’re not completely clueless – is that they “believe” they are good – and that tiny portion of self-confidence can sometimes make a big difference. This article is for the brave women out there that are strong enough to admit that they might need some tips – from a guy’s perspective and the experience of receiving literally thousands of blow jobs.
Tip #1 – Change the Way you Think
Countless women are searching the internet for “techniques” and “tricks” – let me just tell you that you don’t really need that. You can learn every single “special technique” out there – and all of it will be worthless if you don’t have the right attitude. Oral sex is about connecting with your man on a deeper level and being in complete control of his potential pleasure or pain (and in these moment – You have the power to deliver either ultimate pain or pleasure). As I’ve said – most advice on oral sex out there is focusing on “techniques” instead of going to the core of the problem and the reason why most women don’t know how to truly pleasure a man.
I advise you to change the way you view giving a man oral sex – stop looking at it as a “chore” or something that you’re just doing to make him happy. It should be fun – not work. Once you start enjoying it – or at least faking enjoyement in the beginning (until you get good and naturally start enjoying it more) – he will enjoy it A LOT more himself. Yes, sometimes it’s that simple. Emotions tend to jump from one person to another – so if you have a bored, “why didn’t he orgasm yet?” and “am I doing it right?” look on your face – it probably won’t be that attractive. And men are first and foremost visual – we get turned on when we see that YOU enjoy it – even more than we do. That’s why you should never forget that oral sex is more mental than physical – and that is why “techniques” are far less important than having a great attitude.
Tip #2 – Convey Your New Attitude
Once you’ve decided to try out my advice and focus on changing your attiude – the next thing you may be concerned with is “How can I show him that I enjoy it?”. There are many ways, as long as you are creative and not afraid to experiment a bit – you’ll be great. Different guys might prefer different things – that’s why you need to “crash and burn” with your current guy a few times until you figure out what he enjoy the most.
Anyway – back to conveying the “right” attitude. Start of by smiling – there’s nothing easier than that – and you can convey so much with a nice smile, or a laugh. Give him a naughty, seductive look with a smile – as if you can’t wait to start – because “you love to give him oral”. You need to capture all of his senses – so use the tone of your voice the right way, talk in a seductive, turned-on tone – your vibe will pass on to him and once he sees that you really want to give him head and that it’s not just a “chore” he’ll already enjoy it more, even if you didn’t start yet! Talk dirty to him, tell him that you love it, keep eye contact from time to time – and never forget “you love it” and it’s not “work”. Keep out these “work” thoughts out of your head. The moment you start thinking is when everything usually goes downhill – get out of your head and tune into your senses. You need to be passionate and sensual about it. And the easiest way to control his emotions is by controlling your own feelings first.
Tip #3 – Relax and Have Fun
I’ve received hundreds of emails from women asking me how to solve their “oral sex problems” – most of them have something in common. Even after receiving lot’s of information and even though they already know what they need to do to give truly amazing oral – they are still worried about completely unimportant things. That’s because they can’t stop thinking and complicating things for no real reason – stick to the basics (a good attitude) and go on from there.
It’s normal that not every time will be perfect – it’s normal that he sometimes just can’t orgasm (but you can work on that). It is not the end of the world if you fail – and you will fail until you get good at it – so be prepared for messing up a few times here and there, but over time and practice – any woman can get great at giving oral to men. I’ve seen it dozens of times. Just don’t view it as work – it should be fun, look for feedback from your guy – as long as you’re trying to improve, I’m 100% sure he won’t mind you trying over and over again :)
Some of you may say “but why would I even bother mastering oral sex?” This may seem to be a not that important thing for many people out there – but that’s because they haven’t yet realized the power of great oral – and the way it can literally save relationships. Yes, men are that “simple” sometimes. Most couples break up because their sex life is going down hill (or is already dead) – well, what better way to spice it up than amazing “oral pleasure”? :)
Jack has been teaching women how to give great head in his free time because he wants to make the world a happier place with happier couples. You can learn more from him in his brutally honest oral sex guide known as Jacks Blowjob Lessons