There's a theme that runs through my coaching work and it's been (and still is) true for me, and I know, if you too
are a human being also, then it'll surely be true for you.
When you begin dabbling with raw food to any significant degree (say 50% +)
chances are that you will start to think and feel differently to how you did
You will find yourself, automatically, asking bigger questions around a lot of
things, but at the very least about the foods you have eaten previously,
comparing their purity and integrity to the raw foods you're now eating...and
finding yourself very much feeling the divide.
Over time this divide becomes increasingly apparent, and it's here that we face
Do we jump the fence into the field of 100% honesty and find what really
works optimally for us or do we do a U-turn and stay in the twilight world
where "bad" food is sometimes "good" and "good"
food is always "good" (but that feels annoying!)?
Looking back to the start of my own journey, I recall many more times than I
care to remember, that I flat out refused to believe that raw food could make
so much difference to me.
I fought it. I denied it. I tested it. I closed my eyes to the results and
talked myself out of it. And finally, as you would expect, I turned my back on
But of course, truth being as it is, it kept tugging at my conscience and so
turning my back for a day, week, month or more was never, ever the end of it!
And so later, when I was going through a good patch, where life was good and
the food was good too, eventually, after seeing things with open and honest
eyes, I would admit it. Raw food DID make the world of difference. How
annoying!! (This whole little routine happened many, many times over the first
At that point, when I was 100% honest with myself and all was aligned, I would
very happily jump that hurdle into raw food land and enjoy those fairer
pastures, where I would run around joyfully for days, weeks or even months at a
time with no desire whatsoever to jump back over the fence again and into that
And then there would be times, after a little while, when I'd look back over my
shoulder and realise that 99.99% of the people I knew (and cared for) were in
fact not even on the horizon, let alone approaching that jump out of the
twilight zone or U-turning away from it.
And that felt bad. And wrong. And sad. And lonely.
And more often than not I would weigh everything up and say, "You know, I
would rather be with people than raw and virtually alone."
And back I would go. Jumping back over into oven ready meals, tubs of ice-cream
and bottles of vino, "celebrating" my return to "the real
world" and greeting my friends and family with "I'm taking a more
balanced approach; this is much more realistic." (And they would sigh with
relief and welcome me back to the fold, and say "here, have a cheese
sandwich and a glass of wine. Now you can enjoy life again!!")
And then I would crash.
Before not-very-long-at-all I'd feel awful physically, sad emotionally,
confused mentally and disconnected spiritually.
And then I'd just feel even more confused because I wanted the best of both
worlds, but as far as I could see that just wasn't going to happen.
So what to do?
Well, as I said, after many many times of doing this whole "hang out -
jump - hang out - jump back" routine, I finally had to have a good chat
"Karen," I said, "Let's be honest here: How do you really feel
when you're on raw?"
I could finally be honest with myself; I was being direct, I was asking the
right question and I was waiting to hear my own answers. Big relief. And scary
and exciting too...
And my list went something like this
And the next question of course was
"And how do you feel when you go back to cooked? Yes, even a little?"
And my list read...
You get the picture!
When we have evidence in front of our eyes like that we have a choice. We can
either continue to go against what our own self tells us and try to go back or
fit in or even try to walk the line between two worlds (not easy or fun), or we
can commit to following what I affectionately term "the yellow brick
road" and commit not to raw food per se (this is my truth and it may not
be yours), but a life that is built on 100% honesty and commitment to our own
truth however that shows up.
As it turned out, the moment I committed to my own truth my whole world
changed. No exaggeration.
After years of yo-yoing and jumping back and forth trying to avoid the truth
about raw foods and me for fear of what it meant, once I had matured enough to
realise that "to thine own self be true" was the ultimate philosophy to
live by (not just for me but for all of us I believe), I took my mixture of
fear and excitement and turned it into action. There just wasn't anywhere left
I committed to being raw (and now I had clarity it felt very joyful and easy
now at this stage), I committed to finding my life purpose, I committed to
finding a place to live that would support me and act as a "cocoon"
while I metamorphosised into the more fully congruent me, and I committed to
doing whatever else it took to stay on that yellow brick road, to walk it with
a spring in my step and a song in my heart and not to look back.
It's been a few years now since that happened. It was the spring of 1998 and
when I committed to me and to my truth, and not only did I go 100% raw, but I
left London, went to work in a meditation centre, manifested a car, a flatshare
and very soon after a wonderfully positioned and perfectly sized house (all for
me!) overlooking Ely cathedral, and needless to say my whole life changed
completely. I truly felt I was living my bliss.
Since then, it has changed way further still. To go into details would take
another 5 articles and some I'm sure, and I'm still walking that yellow brick
Can I honestly say I never turned back?
No, I can't. There was a time between late 2003 and late 2005 where I really
did turn my back on the whole thing. Three very emotionally turbulent events
all hit within the space of one month and they threw me so off beam that I
really didn't care what road I was on, because I felt so much pain and loss and
so many other painful emotions at that time that nothing else mattered apart
from getting out of that place in one piece, re-aligned and feeling sane!
Eventually, after my two years in the wilderness where I was semi-raw I woke up
from the half-life I had cocooned myself into and decided I was ready to get
back on the road again. It was a fairly slow rise from my couch potato status
to reach the end of that particular story, but once I had got my faith back in
life and the perfection of it again (seeing that in spite of the pain and
turbulence, everything had worked out for the best after all) I rejoined my
path with a renewed sense of joy, purpose and understanding that I never had
And as I got back into raw foods again once more the magic began to kick in.
Once more, as reliably predictable as the sun rising and the sun setting, the
way I felt on raw foods returned and it was as if I had never been away.
Once more on purpose my life moved back into the "magic zone". Things
flowed, I felt aligned and in the right place headed in the right direction.
What a huge relief.
And with that faith once again renewed and knowing that live food would NEVER
let me down and had a level of integrity, energy and purity that no other foods
seemed to have, I once again gravitated towards my own truth and kept on
Ever since that time I have found increasing delight in plunging the depths of
honesty, integrity and even intimacy with myself (from my cells out physically
and from my heart out emotionally), which really is a non-negotiable
fundamental when it comes to living a truly fulfilling, heartfelt, soul-led
Today I find that naturally as part of my work I now very much attract clients
who are at all stages of that journey. Some are in the twilight zone, fighting
it like I did (not just the food but the whole kit and caboodle of what being
truly honest means!), some have made the leap but are now wondering what
they've let themselves in for, and others are happily and consciously walking
the yellow brick road but need ongoing assistance and support and handholding
from someone who has trodden that path before.
Whatever stage of the journey you are at, my main message for this time is to
know that, although the journey to rawdom can appear very scary at times, it
really is the safest territory on earth that we are walking when we start that
journey towards our highest, most vibrant and fully alive version of truth.