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Written by Tera on February 23, 2012 – -
by Tera Warner
Before you wriggle in your chair or get all blushy-faced about what I am about to say, allow me to explain my rather provocative title…
In preparing for the WISH Summit interviews this year, I was determined to get Nicole Daedone, the author ofSlow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm. My dear friend, Dr. Lissa Rankin was telling me all about how Nicole’s work had transformed her life, so I knew I needed to get a taste of this! Given her schedule and writing commitments, it was NOT easy to schedule a call with Nicole, but we did it.
To help me prepare for the call, I bought a copy of her book, Slow Sex and started reading it. It was the beginning of January, and I was actually on my way to deliver a keynote presentation at the T-Tapp Beauty Bootcamp. Once I cracked the book open, I didn’t close it again until I had devoured every single page!
While I would have completely expected to be focused on my presentation and preparing for my upcoming event, I could do nothing but read this book. I was shocked and surprised at my reaction! I wasn’t even close to feeling ready for the presentation the next day, and so why on Earth wasn’t I able to unglue myself from this book and work on my presentation!
It was 3:00 in the morning on the day I was going to give my presentation, and I decided that I was going to show a room full of about 100 women how to have a 15-minute orgasm.
And I was going to do it using nothing other than an apple.
Now, when I announced my intention to the room of T-Tappers, they were wriggling in their chairs and turning a rosy shade in the cheeks just like you did when you read the title of this post.
Some rolled their eyes and snorted.
Some giggled a shy giggle.
Some hooted and hollered a resounding cheer!
But the one thing that was very clear was that almost every woman in that room was operating with the WRONG definition of “orgasm” and I was about to completely rewire the way they were thinking.
As Nicole Daedone so eloquently points out throughout her book and in all her workshops, “orgasm” has been misunderstood as being synonymous with “climax”–which is a very masculine way of understanding orgasm.
Here’s a new definition for you to consider:
“Orgasm is the ability to receive and respond to pleasure.” -Nicole Daedone
Well, now doesn’t that take on a whole, new meaning. The days of huffing and puffing and moaning like a porn star are over, Ladies! It’s time to tune into your pleasure and completely redefine and re-experience your sensual potential like never before!
In Nicole’s book she elaborates in great detail about a technique known as “OM” (Orgasmic Meditation). Without going into the details (you can get the book and find out for yourself) what I will say is that part of the success of the technique comes about because of the things that are stripped away from what we usually associate with sex and intimacy.
There is no reciprocity in this technique (other than the man’s own pleasure derived from being completely attentive and responsive to his partner).
There aren’t even naked bodies!
There’s no music, no expectations about climax or orgasm at all.
There’s no caressing, no kissing, no moaning to put on a good show.
There is, however, a whole lot of attention on the tiny, left, upper quadrant of the clitoris, and THAT is everything you need to completely redefine what you thought about sex, intimacy, orgasm and pleasure!
Well, one of the big lessons we have to learn when coming on board the raw food diet, or just any healthy diet, is to simplify. We’re going to strip away the social pressure to eat and socialize the way everyone else says we’re supposed to eat and socialize.
We’re going to stop putting on a show with our food, by making it elaborate, rich and highly processed, and get back to whole, simple foods.
We’re going to SLOW DOWN and become aware of the sensations going on in our body.Wait for hunger to rise, then let it persist and insist for a while before you eat. Let yourself salivate and FEEL your hunger. Feel the pull in your stomach asking for something. The longer you wait to give it to yourself, the better it will taste.
Feel the air on your skin as you reach for a succulent apple. When you do finally pick up the apple, take your time. Go slowly. Feel it–the weight of the apple in your hand, the pressure in your palm, the temperature of the peel on your fingertips.
Bring it slowly to your lips, but don’t eat it!
Feel it as much as you can. Let it caress your cheeks and lips.
THIS is your ability to receive and respond to pleasure. You can be completely orgasmic every moment of the day by simply receiving and responding to pleasure.
Unfortunately, most of us are jamming food down the pipes with one hand on the steering wheel and another on the cellphone. Being addicted to the stimulation of processed, highly spiced, fatty, salty, sweet foods and the chronic “bing” of another text message or email coming in is never going to bring you the kind of pleasure that comes from slowly, attentively, seductively eating an apple.
You can learn a lot more about Nicole Daedone and her OM technique, as well as the principles described in her book, Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasmby tuning into her upcoming interview during the WISH Summit. Our WISH Summit starts on March 8th, and will last 40 days and 40 nights! Sign up and join us for the world’s biggest empowerment party for women!
Tera…. once again…. awesome post…. Yes.. Im still around.. lol.. dont know if you remember me…. =) But I have been in the side wings… watching reading and applauding….. Keep up the good work beautiful!! <3