Written by Tera on October 24, 2011 – -
- by Tera Warner I’ve never been more than 15-20 pounds over my ideal weight, so some may look at me and think I’ve got no reason to complain, but self-loathing doesn’t discriminate based on your size. I’ve learned by personal experience, and having now worked with tens of thousands of women around the world, that there are a few nasty habits we share when we’re feeling “fat” and they only work to perpetuate a DIEting culture that keeps us obsessed about the size of our thighs and wishing we were someone else’s body. Let me know if this feels familiar: When you’re feeling uncomfortable in your skin, when your thighs rub and your belly hangs over your belt, the last thing you really want to do is be seen by other people. You avoid having pictures being taken of yourself, and on the rare chance someone gets one, you’re going to suck it in for all its worth and pray that your pudge doesn’t show! You find excuses to stay away and isolate yourself from social engagements, since it feels much easier to hang around the house in sweat pants. The only trouble with that is, instead of engaging in conversations and experiences that could pull you out of your shell, you sink deeper in. You don’t just stay stuck in your house, you stay stuck in your head, and that’s the last place you’ll find solutions, comfort or support to make the changes you need. Sweat pants are not your friend. The longer you allow yourself to stay hidden behind a baggy shirt and pants, the worse it gets. You stop investing in beautiful clothes that make you feel good, because you decide it’s better to wait until you can lose a few pounds (no point buying anything you won’t fit in a few weeks or months). Trouble is, because you keep walking around in baggy clothes that do not flatter you, you stay hidden and a few weeks become a few months, become a few years. You’ll have to shed your layers and start investing in yourself. Go to a big second hand store and invest the time in finding a few things you love that make you feel great! Second hand stores are loaded with treasures for every size. It doesn’t matter how oddly shaped your body is. Go get something to make yourself feel fabulous and kick start the chain reaction of self-care that is needed for you to improve things in your body and every aspect of your life. When you feel “fat” the counters don’t matter, the fridge can stay messy and the bed can stay unmade. Generally speaking, there are always exceptions to the rule, but when you’re carrying extra weight, you’re carrying extra clutter in your space, mess in your purse, junk in your cupboards and rotting food in your fridge. You accumulate stuff, mess, dust, clutter and excess weight. This only makes things worse, because when the cupboards are full of junk, you eat it. When the fridge is stuffed with rotting bags of produce, it’s easier to stuff your face with take out. When you’re feeling fat in your internal environment, it’s easy to create an external environment that drags you down further, rather than one that lifts you up and is a haven for your healthy body and lifestyle. Chances are slim that when you feel fat you will take the time to lovingly brush your skin, your hair, your teeth. How likely are you to run a beautiful, luxurious bath and take the time to celebrate your curves with a delicious exfoliating scrub, or a yummy body oil? Generally speaking, when you feel fat, you won’t want to look at your skin, touch your body or even brush your hair. But the trap of this one is that you cannot change the things you’re not willing to confront. You can start an entire self-care revolution by simply, lovingly touching yourself and treating yourself as you would your own beautiful daughter. When the language you use to describe yourself, when the images you hold of yourself are unkind and unflattering, you will never be able to lift yourself higher, or achieve the body and health and sense of well-being you deserve. You gotta paint the picture, then walk into it. You have to start loving yourself now, in spite of all the reasons you find to do otherwise. You’ll never get thin as long as you feel fat. TONIGHT: There’s a fabulous teleseminar with my dear friend Carol Look on “Why You’ll Never Get Thin as Long as You Feel Fat”. This will give you a complete body image makeover and empower you to take your health and your body to a whole new level. I don’t think I would be able to accurately calculate the number of hours I’ve spent worrying about the width of my hips or the size of my thighs, and staring at some other woman’s body wishing it was mine! If I had to add up all the hours that I’ve spent calculating calories and feeling guilty for having eaten too much, too quickly, too often, too late, too salty, too fatty, too sweet, too refined, etc… *sigh* I would have years of accumulated time on my hands — time that could be spent building empires, cuddling with my children, reading books, and dreaming of the knight in shining armour that will one day sweet me off my feet! “There has to be a better way.” I so clearly remember the day I walked to my fridge and came up with the idea of “Body Enlightenment”. At the time I had an actual tool box of foods I had padlocked from myself in an attempt to avoid eating them. (Of course, this only made them that much more attractive to me.) Padlocks never worked. Deprivation and severe restriction never worked. (It would ultimately end up in a compulsion to eat the very things I’d been restricting myself from.) Hating my body never made it more beautiful. Isolating myself from other people never pulled me out of my shell. And getting on a scale, measuring the centimeters of cellulite on my thighs and obsessing about the amount of lard in my lunch only kept me stuck in my head feeling obsessed and suffocated by an unhealthy relationship with my food and myself. I knew there had to be another way, and I’ve devoted much of the last 7 years of my life to studying everything I could about health and human behaviour and designing what I believe is the model for women’s health and well-being that will finally reveal the DIE of dieting for what it is!! Body Enlightenment will be taking center stage on October 26th at Noon Eastern. It’s time to create a new model for women’s health — and on October 26th it’s going to happen. HERE’S YOUR CHANCE:
If you’ve been reading my recent blog posts, and feel the Body Enlightenment program could be the solution you’ve been waiting for, then tell us why and share your story in the comment section below! You could win access to our upcoming program opening on October 26th. You have ONE WEEK to share your story. At the end of this week, we’ll choose our winner. Registrations for the upcoming Body Enlightenment program will end on November 4 at midnight and the program officially begins Sunday, November 6th! Hope to see you there and get to know you more!
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