I quit.

Guess what I’m doing?

In about 4 hours I’m heading to the doctor’s office. He’s going to be SO PLEASED with me, because not only has he not seen me since I was 35 pounds heavier, but I’m going to be asking him for a prescription for Chantix, the stop-smoking drug that I’ve heard from dozens of close friends works wonders.

I really do WANT to quit, and that’s the one constant everyone seems to say is most important. You have to want to quit in order for it to work. Of course, everyone’s got their own major reason to justify to themselves why they want or need to quit, and for ages mine was “I’ll quit if and when I ever get pregnant.” Well, that philosophy’s changed immensely for me.

• I’m trying to lose weight, and to do so I need to exercise. Exercising is much easier when your lungs aren’t struggling to get oxygen.
• Cigarettes are going up to $6.05 a pack here in NY in a few days. I’m trying to save money, and by quitting, I’ll be saving myself about $227 a month (which is enough to pay for my health insurance every month), which is $2724 a year (or I could put that monthly savings into an interest bearing account and conservatively make that total $3883 for the year), and given the thought that the price won’t increase ever again (which we know it will), and given the hope that I live to be at least 80 years old, that means for the rest of my life I’ll save a minimum of $133,476! If THAT’s invested all along, I could be a multi-millionaire by that age! (Five dollars a day saved on cigarettes over the next 40 years will turn into $1,764,715, according to Dave Ramsey. And I’m talking about saving over $6 a day for the next 49 years.)
• I really am tired of feeling like a leper. Having to go outside no matter where I am if I want to smoke, smelling like it on my hands, clothes, hair, and breath, the damage it’s done to my skin and teeth, I swear… It’s truly a vile and repulsive addiction.
• I DO want to get pregnant someday. And I don’t want to have to struggle with this at that point. I also don’t want to necessarily have to limit my options of choosing a father (ie. husband) by his smoking preference. I’ve found that many guys I’m attracted to are non-smokers (gee, wonder why…) and well, who the hell as a non-smoker wants to get close to a woman who stinks and looks like she’s 10 years older than she is? (Not that I do yet, I hope!)
• Most of my friends don’t smoke. My mother does, my grandmother does, my cousin whom I work with on occasion does, but my friends do not. How awkward is THAT!? (By the way, both my mother and grandmother have stated that if Chantix works for me, they’ll both go on it. I LOVE that!)

So I’m going to get the prescription today, and I’m hoping I’ll have the cash to fill it (not sure if my insurance covers any part of it, and it costs about $100 without insurance coverage) by June 1st. I’m really actually EXCITED to quit. I know it’s still not going to be “easy” but it’ll hopefully be easier than when I tried to use the patch a few months ago, and lasted only 24, stressful, anxious, horrible hours.

I’m hoping to keep track of this here on the site, so stay tuned, and feel free to ask me anything about the experience if you have questions!