So, after the successful IVF in the fall, I signed up for a newsletter. You know, the weekly pregnancy newsletter. I should have known better. But, it was a moment of weakness. Anyway, after the miscarriage, instead of going through the "unsubscribe" process I just used my friend Mr. Gmail, and marked it spam. It's worked. Until now. This morning, I was greeted by this:
Hi Mama-to-be, Congrats!You're 32 weeks pregnant!
Well, that SUCKED! Sucked in that knock the wind right out of you, throw up in your mouth kind of suck. Holy Shit! 32 weeks!?! I guess I've been avoiding the math. That's almost a real live baby. Instead, here I am, empty womb, with all of my hope and possibility and fear frozen in 3 little embryos across town. Sadly, they are probably safer at -196 C then in my uterus.