Sticky Feet's Friday feature is Friday Flashback. I hope you'll enjoy some of my posts from the original Sticky Feet blog. As I look through the archives, it is amazing how much things change.... but yet, how much things stay the same!
The post below was originally posted on January 1, 2007.
Yesterday we went into Chicago to seeWickedfor the second time. It was amazing yet again! The music from the musical is amazing and there are so many songs that I can really feel. One of the songs that I really like is "Defying Gravity" and it seems somehow fitting and appropriate for my New Year's resolutions. Here is an excerpt: (For the full song lyricsclick here.)
2006 was not my best year but I hope to enter into 2007 by turning over a new leaf. I hope that this year I really will be "Defying Gravity" in many ways. To begin this process I have determined several goals that I would like to achieve in the coming year. 1. Become a mother. Whether this is through IVF or adoption I am not sure at this point but I hope that this year will bethe year. We will be doing our next IVF cycle in February (crossing fingers that everything works out with the insurance). After two rounds of IVF with PGD we are planning to start the adoption process and hopefully adopt two children from Russia. I am realistic and realize that I may not actually have a child at this point next year but I hope to be either pregnant or in the midst of adoption -- both of which are significantly further than I currently am. 2. Work on being healthy - both physically and mentally. I will exercise more while eating less and more healthful food. I plan to enter my food intoFitdayeveryday. I hope to follow a lot of the healthy guidelines that I have learned from doing the Weight Watchers Core plan in the past. I will also try to reduce my stress level as much as possible by giving myself a break when needed and listening to myinfertility relaxation mp3s more. 3. Be more positive. I want to try harder to live each day to the fullest and really enjoy all of the positive things that are currently in my life. I don't do this nearly enough. I need to enjoy each day. I need to not focus on getting through the week or getting to the next cycle so much and focus more on the here and now and all of the wonderful things that I currently have. I need to take the time to smell the coffee. :) 4. Work on my relationships with those around me. With Mike, with Mandy, with Mom and Grandpa and all of the kids at school. I think #3 will go a long way towards helping me to achieve this. I need to take more time to focus on Mike and his needs. With infertility it becomes very easy to become "me" centered in all of the wrong ways. I also need to spend more time with my family and be more understanding of the stage of life that Mandy is currently in. I need to realize that my kids at school have problems too and try to be more laid back in the classroom without sacrificing learning. 5. Work on spending more time on myself without feeling guilty about it. While infertility does make me more "me" centered in some ways that are negative I need to focus on becoming more "me" centered in ways that are positive. Taking the time to eat breakfast in the morning, to exercise, to relax, to go have a massage. And I need to take away the guilt factor. If I don't make Mike dinner he won't starve. If I don't see my parents everyday they will not love me less. 6. Try to be more of a minimalist. After the on-slot of the holidays I am quickly becoming overwhelmed with the amount of random crap we have in our house. Sometimes it is good to downsize and put the money that I would spend on a sweater in the bank. (But you can't discount retail therapy either!) I want to downsize in some ways and work on getting rid of a lot of the things that we do not need. 7. Become a runner. I know I am going to have to start slow... Currently I can't even run 1/4 of a mile without being winded. By this time next year I would like to be able to run at least 2 miles easily. 8. Learn to knit. I would like to be able to give a few Christmas gifts that I have knitted myself next year. 9. Continue blogging. While blogging can bog me down sometimes I know that just venting and getting my thoughts on paper goes a long way to helping my mental health. I need to find a happy balance with it so that the internet is not quite so much of an obsession as it is for me while still providing me with the wonderful support that I receive from the infertile blogging community and from some of the other sites I frequent. 10. Figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Currently I have full intentions of spending the next year and a half in my current job. Mostly this is because of my yearbook girls and because I promised them that I would not leave until they graduate (this will be in the Spring of 2008). While I do plan to continue teaching until then I am not sure if I want to continue teaching after that. I hope to use 2007 to figure out what it is I want to do and figure out a way to make it happen -- whether it means going back to school, starting to write a novel, or just choosing a different career path -- I am not sure yet.
My thoughts 4 years later...
It is amazing to me how many of these goals are still goals that I am working towards. Many of them will be constant goals throughout my life. This is definitely one of those posts that makes me realize that even though my life has changed so much over the last few years, the fundamentals of who I am haven't really changed at all.