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Birth Story (or why does no one care what I think?)

Posted Jan 14 2009 5:55pm
The night before the c-section, my Pepcid stopped working. Gagging on acid at 4 am, I decided to give up on sleep and start getting my stuff together for the hospital. We took the Monster Toddler to the husband's grandmother's house and headed to the hospital. Between the early start and the fact that I forgot their would be no traffic that early in the morning, we got to the hospital a half hour early. They weren't ready for us, so we had to wait in the waiting room until the room was set up.

Look how huge I am. I've only lost 10 pounds. I so need a diet.

Once admitted to the room, I got changed into a gown that didn't fit. I explained to the nurse that I couldn't tie the thing since the ties would barely reach each other, but she didn't care a bit that my butt was hanging out. I cared, but that seemed to be the theme for my stay in the hospital. Me caring about something and the staff, not so much.

I was hooked up to an external fetal monitor and showed that I was having minor contractions about 7 minutes apart. I had thought they were braxton hicks, but apparently not. I took it as a sign that I was supposed to be having this baby today.

I had my IV put in painfully and then the catheter, surprisingly less painfully. The husband got his scrubs and we were off to the operating room.

Things went downhill quickly with the anesthesiologist. He put a spinal block in and it was horrible. He had to try three times. The first time sent a painful shock down my left leg, causing me to yell out and start crying. The second time he sent less painful, but but still upsetting, shocks down both of my legs. He finally got it the third time. I've had epidurals, which are pretty much the same procedure as far as I know, twice and have never had shocks or an anesthesiologist have to try more than once.

The surgery began and I felt nothing. I mean nothing. Not the pulling and pressure that I felt last time. Absolutely nothing. At first, it seemed like a good deal. Then the block that was supposed to only numb to my chest continued moving upward. It went up so high my hands and tongue were numb. Since my nose was stuffy from the previous crying, I started having trouble breathing. I had to breath through my mouth and consciously make myself breathe or I wouldn't breathe at all. I attempted to tell the anesthesiologist about it, but he kept wandering away and wasn't paying any attention to me. He eventually realized something was wrong when I was unable to stay awake. My blood pressure had dropped to something like 70/30 and he had to call someone to get some epinephrine to get it back up somewhere that I could stay conscious.

Lorelei Jayne was born during my trouble breathing but before my lack of awakeness, so I did get to see her before she was whisked away to the nursery. A nurse had told the husband to sneak a camera in with him and when the time came, she took Lorelei's first few pictures, still covered in most of the vernix. The rest of the surgery went very quickly, but then again, I don't know how long I was out for.

Newborns covered in vernix look kind of gross. No wonder they don't look like this on TV.

Due to the epinephrine, I didn't have the problems with my low blood pressure during the hour of recovery like I did last time. This time, my body temperature was much lower than the nurse would have liked and I was covered in this blow-up hot air blanket thing. Once my temperature was closer to normal I was wheeled directly into the nursery. Lorelei's blood sugar was low and her temperature was also too low, so she had to spend a little extra time there. The nurses took her out of the warmer and let me hold her for a few minutes since the feeling had come back into my arms. I was then wheeled back into my room.

The morphine I was given after the surgery made my face itch like crazy so I was given a shot of benedryl and I slept for a couple hours. Once I woke up, the husband brought the Hellion to come meet her newest little sister. She didn't seem too enthused, but newborns don't really do anything exciting, so it was understandable.

That night, the nurse I will from here on refer to as "the horrible nurse," not to be confused with all of the other wonderful nurses, had me walking up and down the hallway. It was painful, but not unbearable and I agreed to it because I knew the sooner I got up and around, the faster I would recover. Later that night I couldn't sleep. The baby was in the nursery and usually they would give me a sleeping pill because I can't sleep in a hospital ever. I woke up every two minutes all night long because of the blow-up things on my legs that prevent blood clots. The horrible nurse wouldn't let me take them off, even though I had proven that I could walk around well. She wouldn't give me anything to help me sleep either. Why would I want drugs when I was doing so well? She finally offered to give me a shot of morphine saying that it would help me sleep. I took it and then realized that she lied. I didn't get any sleep and was high on top of it.

At 6 am, the horrible nurse came in and said I should sit in the chair. I did so and was in a decent amount of pain. I made it quite clear that I needed pain medication. She disappeared. Turns out, her shift ended and she went home. I was left trapped in the chair until my doctor came in at 10 am. She seemed surprised to find me in the chair. Even more surprised to hear that I was walking around the halls less than 12 hours after the surgery. The husband showed up and made sure the new, very nice nurse unhooked me from the catheter, IV and heart/breathing monitor. He also had her immediately bring me drugs, liquids and a promise of solid food by dinner.

The rest of my hospital stay was pretty uneventful. The Monster Toddler was brought to see me and seemed to dislike Lorelei and me by extension immediately. She's now quite interested in her, but still a little annoyed with me.

The night before I was discharged, I went for a walk with my mom. I left Lorelei in the room with my father. I had done the exact same thing the night before and no one cared. This time the horrible nurse had returned and bitched at me about leaving my baby with someone without a wristband. I explained that I would have brought her to the nursery had I known it was an issue and that it wouldn't happen again. She continued to bitch at me going as far as to say that next time they would have to call a code gray which means patient elopement and security would come and get me. At this point I just laughed at her. I was allowed to wander anywhere I wanted and I knew that. The other nurses had told me. No one had told me I couldn't leave the baby with my father. I read their list of maternity rules and that wasn't one of them. Either way, I wasn't going to do it again and I thought the problem was over. I was wrong.

It was snowing Saturday morning, so one of the nurses woke me up and had me pack all my stuff to leave to avoid what they thought was going to be a blizzard. Lorelei was discharged by the pediatrician, but my doctor couldn't be found. The husband and I waited around for hours, bored out of our minds. We gave Lorelei back to the nursery and told the nurses station that we were going to wander around since they still couldn't find my doctor. The horrible nurse then began saying that they already had a problem with me yesterday and did I really thing it was a good idea to risk my discharge by leaving the floor. Like they were just going to keep me locked in the hospital indefinitely. She went as far as saying that they talked to the doctor and he was on his way now. Of course, she couldn't have realized that the husband was right next to the nurse who actually called my doctor, only to find that he was still unavailable. We left the floor for about a half hour and then still had to wait twenty minutes for my doctor to arrive, in his street clothes. They finally got a hold of him and he wasn't planning on coming in anytime soon until they asked him to. I was immediately discharged and Lorelei and I were in the car on the way home within minutes.

Since coming home the Hellion was told me that she "likes this baby" as opposed to that baby (Monster Toddler), I'd imagine. Still understandable, as this baby is incapable of biting her like that baby is fond of doing. Little does she realize that this baby will grow up quickly and be able to chase after her and bite her in no time.
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