We’ve all heard this line before at some point during our career as Mommy. Typically, the line makes me cringe. What does working have to do with one’s parenting skills? However, I’ll admit that I’m starting to see the light.
I’m some type of weird hybrid Mom. I don’t really stay at home with my kids, I don’t really work outside the home, and I don’t really work at home either. I’ve taken all of these traditional roles, blended them together, and devised a working/parenting schedule that works the best for my kids and for me.
I feel like I can empathize equally with SAHM, WAHM, and WOHM’s since I see a little of myself in all of these acronyms. Truly though, I don’t fit any of these roles.
As time has progressed ad I’ve developed what works best for our family, I’ve also realized that the saying that makes me cringe, is actually true in my life. Working does make me a better Mom.
1. Less Financial Stress – Notice I said “less” financial stress and not no financial stress. I think all families have some stress when it comes to finances and ours is no different. While I don’t worry about where our grocery money is coming from each\ week, I do worry about paying for the trios college education. While my working does cost us money in child-care expenses, it ultimately does contribute to the bottom-line in our budget.
2. More focused on children during my time with them. When I am with my kids, I don’t work. When I am with my kids, I don’t typically do much except try my best to meet their basic needs and play with them. I don’t think I would have this same luxury if I didn’t work. Those few hours every day that are my “work” time can also be spent doing things like prepping dinner, printing coloring pages, and updating my blog so I don’t have to do those things during the time I am with my kids.
3. “me” time – Yes, I do try to take some time for myself each day. Sometimes the only “me” time I receive is grading essays, but other days, I manage to squeeze in a half hour on the treadmill, or 5 minutes with a cup of coffee. Other times, I intentionally plan to work more in the evening so I can enjoy lunch with Mike or go to the doctor without an entourage. Knowing I have consistent and reliable childcare allows me to schedule in a bit of “me” time that I wouldn’t have if I was solely a SAHM.
4. Adaptable children – I feel that my kids are more adaptable and more social because of their exposure to other children. Bo loves preschool and had zero trouble with the transition. I am not sure it would have been as smooth if he hadn’t already been in a childcare situation for several hours each week. The girls also seem to not have the same stranger anixety that Bo had when he was younger and I credit this to their interactions in child care as well.
5. Routine – I’m a mom who is very motivated by routine and my kids know this routine. Having somewhere to take the kids each day and having those few hours to work not only provides routine and structure for the kids but also for me. I can easily see how I would slip into leaving my kiddos in pajamas more often than not if I didn’t have to work. Sure, I still wear sweatpants most days, and don’t shower nearly enough, but at least my kids are dressed!
As I re-read this post, it seems like I’m trying to justify why I’m not a traditional SAHM, and perhaps I am. I’ll admit to feeling guilt and pressure for not fulfilling this role. However, the real point of the post is just to say that different situations work for different families and my hybrid situation is currently working for us.
We’ve all heard this line before at some point during our career as Mommy. Typically, the line makes me cringe. What does working have to do with one’s parenting skills? However, I’ll admit that I’m starting to see the light.
I’m some type of weird hybrid Mom. I don’t really stay at home with my kids, I don’t really work outside the home, and I don’t really work at home either. I’ve taken all of these traditional roles, blended them together, and devised a working/parenting schedule that works the best for my kids and for me.
I feel like I can empathize equally with SAHM, WAHM, and WOHM’s since I see a little of myself in all of these acronyms. Truly though, I don’t fit any of these roles.
As time has progressed ad I’ve developed what works best for our family, I’ve also realized that the saying that makes me cringe, is actually true in my life. Working does make me a better Mom.
1. Less Financial Stress – Notice I said “less” financial stress and not no financial stress. I think all families have some stress when it comes to finances and ours is no different. While I don’t worry about where our grocery money is coming from each\ week, I do worry about paying for the trios college education. While my working does cost us money in child-care expenses, it ultimately does contribute to the bottom-line in our budget.
2. More focused on children during my time with them. When I am with my kids, I don’t work. When I am with my kids, I don’t typically do much except try my best to meet their basic needs and play with them. I don’t think I would have this same luxury if I didn’t work. Those few hours every day that are my “work” time can also be spent doing things like prepping dinner, printing coloring pages, and updating my blog so I don’t have to do those things during the time I am with my kids.
3. “me” time – Yes, I do try to take some time for myself each day. Sometimes the only “me” time I receive is grading essays, but other days, I manage to squeeze in a half hour on the treadmill, or 5 minutes with a cup of coffee. Other times, I intentionally plan to work more in the evening so I can enjoy lunch with Mike or go to the doctor without an entourage. Knowing I have consistent and reliable childcare allows me to schedule in a bit of “me” time that I wouldn’t have if I was solely a SAHM.
4. Adaptable children – I feel that my kids are more adaptable and more social because of their exposure to other children. Bo loves preschool and had zero trouble with the transition. I am not sure it would have been as smooth if he hadn’t already been in a childcare situation for several hours each week. The girls also seem to not have the same stranger anixety that Bo had when he was younger and I credit this to their interactions in child care as well.
5. Routine – I’m a mom who is very motivated by routine and my kids know this routine. Having somewhere to take the kids each day and having those few hours to work not only provides routine and structure for the kids but also for me. I can easily see how I would slip into leaving my kiddos in pajamas more often than not if I didn’t have to work. Sure, I still wear sweatpants most days, and don’t shower nearly enough, but at least my kids are dressed!
As I re-read this post, it seems like I’m trying to justify why I’m not a traditional SAHM, and perhaps I am. I’ll admit to feeling guilt and pressure for not fulfilling this role. However, the real point of the post is just to say that different situations work for different families and my hybrid situation is currently working for us.