You shouldn't think of yourself as disgusting. It's much easier to lose weight if you accept yourself as you are. I have had the same issues, I know how you feel. But your husband loves you and thinks you are sexy.

I highly recommend that you go to personallifemedia.com and listen the the free (FREE as in costs u nothing :D)podcast called Inside Out Weight Loss, by Renee Stephens. It is amazing and has helped me to overcome my dieting and weight obsession, improve my body image and lose weight in the process. Check it out, you won't be sorry.  Good luck, and don't be so hard on yourself.