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Emotional Secrets To The Physical Body

Posted Dec 01 2008 10:10am
(Photo by superfantastic on flickr)

Tears started to well at the corner of my eyes. Six needles were being inserted into various meridian points on my left knee. With each application, I felt a rush of blood or energy flow draining away from my knee all the way down to the bottom of my feet. My visit on Saturday morning to the Traditional Chinese Medicine Doctor or sinseh was not quite what I was expecting. It was my first acupuncture session. I have never injured myself before, despite being engaged in a number of extreme watersports in the past.

The ligaments to my knees had been “strained” or injured due to a series of snow skiing lessons I have been taking over the past couple of weeks. Just prior to the acupuncture session, Dr Zhou had also used tui na; a traditional form of Chinese massage that had me crying aloud in pain.

The heat of a lamp was directed over the needles as I laid on the bed immobilized. My legs felt numb. While waiting for half hour to pass, I started to examine my fears. The prick of a single needle was but an instant. Were my tears due to physical or emotional stress? I could sense a cloud of dense emotions pervading over me.

Snow Skiing Fears

In preparation for an upcoming trip to Hokkaido in Japan, I had been taking snow skiing classes. While I have mastered skiing on water years ago, I have never tried it on snow. I realized that conquering the slopes introduced a new set of fears for me. It had been a long time, a good 8 years since the birth of my elder girl, in venturing beyond the gym.

These were the fears that I identified: Fear of falling. Fear of heights. Fear that signing on for extra classes would mean taking more time away from my work. Fear of not being able to control my skis. Fear of crashing into anyone in my path down the slope. Fear conjured over the thought of not being able to avoid a tree on the ski slopes in Japan!!

I felt helpless each time when I fell down, as it meant that I needed assistance from the coach. There were a number of times when I was “suicidal”, screaming all the way downhill as I could not stop my skis. Then, there were others when I was stuck mid-slope, unable to move or maneuver my ski. I was quite a comical sight!!

Needless to say, I did not enjoy my lessons very much. The coach identified the problem to be one of inadequate practice. Due to an otherwise overbooked schedule, I could not go often enough for lessons.

Initially, I complained bitterly. I had every reason to believe that my upcoming trip to Japan would be one vacation I would not enjoy. Gradually, as I reflected over my poor attitude, it hit upon me that fears arising from my snow skiing trips were providing me a perfect opportunity for more self healing.

So I jumped right into it. Every night for two weeks, I used EFT to address any fear in falling or of heights for my younger daughter and I. My elder daughter had no problems going down the slope but my younger girl was facing a hard time too. While I observed improvements in confidence levels, the state of my body gradually worsen.

With a series of bad falls, I started to experience “bad” knees. Knees that refused to obey my commands. Knees that were painful as I climbed stairs, whether up or down. Knees that I could hardly bend.

Unlocking Further Secrets Of My Knees

After the acupuncture session and over the last two days, my knees felt weak. My left knee especially was even more painful than before. Dr Zhou had warned me that it would take a few days to recover. Not exactly good news since that meant that I had to stay indoors and unable to do what I had wanted done over the weekend.

With time on my hands while I took a rest, I began to wonder if there was more negative stuff to my knees that I had not uncovered. Could there be a root fear that I was not previously aware of?

Well, I was right!! To begin with, the results of my investigation showed that I was dealing with a myriad of fears. I discovered that my left knee was storing the following emotions:

Depressed. Disgusted. Doubt. Exhausted. Fear. Hurt. Immobilized. Indignation. Loneliness. Loveless. Morbid. Needy. Offended. Shame. Stagnant. Suppressed. Unprepared. Unreliable. Unworthy. Victimized. Wary. Wilful. Woeful. Abandoned. Apprehensive.

And the root of it all was - A Fear of Aging!

(Photo by Eddie 07 on Flickr)

I was fearful of growing old physically and becoming dependent on others. I began to recall how I have always thought of not wanting to end up like the many old folks I have seen, unable to walk, being physically immobile and needing assistance from their family members.

I also realized how my focus is on the lack, the not-wanting. My knee had behaved like I was already 60 or 70, in a similar position to one of the elderly folks I have come across.

I would not have thought that going for snow skiing classes would invoke anything related to aging, dying and death. Well, apparently, it did, at the deeper layers for me!

Wish Me Luck

I used a combination of EFT, soul and karmic cleansing, and chios healing (performed by my girlfriend) to remove the dense energies of dark emotions from my knees. As all energy work takes up to 21 days for effects to permanently settle, I will have to wait to see what happens when I come down the slopes of Rusutsu Resort in Hokkaido Japan in another few weeks time.

In the meantime, my pain had subsided although it is not completely gone. I also have another two more appointment sessions with Dr Zhou to complete.

Do wish me luck!!

Your Thoughts Please

Acupuncture. Ever tried acupuncture? Let me know how it was for you. Acupuncture as I know it, is not supposed to be painful. Hence, it was likely that I was dealing with more of a perceived pain than is actually the case!

Root Causes of Physical Problems. How far do you go in terms of self healing? Do you simply rely on Western medicine to cure your symptoms? Or do you agree with the idea that healing our physical body is not quite complete without a look into our negative emotions?

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