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Tiger Faces Flood of Bimbos

Posted Dec 03 2009 12:00am

tiger-woods1Bimbos are popping up all over!  One, a woman who denied having an affair with Tiger Woods will hold a news conference with her lawyer today, a day after the golfer apologized for his “transgressions.”  That lawyer?

gloriaallredGloria Allred.  Shrill, feminist attorney, celebrity ambulance chaser, GLORIA ALLRED!

Others are releasing tapes of Tiger speaking on their voice mail.

Methinks if Tiger Woods had just talked to the cops and released a statement immediately after the accident, he wouldn’t be in the hot water he’s in right now.  Or am I being naive?

Yeah, probably.

If Elin Woods is the kind of angry wife who would chase her fleeing hubby’s SUV down the driveway, waving a golf club (a “wedge”, as it turns out) at him, at some point this would have become public.

I mean — is the man an IDIOT?  He LEFT a MESSAGE… IDENTIFYING himself… on one of his bimbette’s VOICE MAILS!

“Hey, it’s Tiger,” a man says in the recording. “I need you to do me a huge favor. Can you please take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone and may be calling you.”

I mean, GOOD LORD!

I can just hear that conversation now!

“Tiger!  TIGER!  Who the hell is Jaimee Grubbs?  Why has she called you on your private cell phone a dozen times?  Who IS this woman, Tiger?  Tiger?  TIGER!  GET YOUR ASS BACK IN HERE!  I’m not FINISHED with you yet, you bastard!  GET BACK HERE OR I’LL BASH YOUR BRAINS IN WITH THIS GOLF CLUB THAT THE MEDIA WILL LATER IDENTIFY AS A WEDGE!”

I will never, never, never, never, NEVER understand why the rich and famous and high profile men in this country think they can get away with “hiking the Applachian trail” or “taking a wide stance in the mens’ room” or “meeting a hostess at a DC hotel while doing business as New York Governor,” or “sending sexy text messages to cute little male pages in the House of Representatives” or “getting a quick hummer in the Oval Office”.  I don’t understand the acceptance of risk that these guys are taking for what amounts to an orgasm.

Except, perhaps, they think that their fame, their wealth, their “specialness” ENTITLES them to it.

I dunno.

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