Unfortunately - or fortunately, depending on how you look at it - I am the healthiest pregnant woman on the planet. Let me explain. I went for my weekly appointment at the OB's office today and saw the nurse practitioner that I usually see. I really, really like her because she tells it like it is and explains anything you ask. So, as she measured me (right on target!), took my blood pressure (perfect!) and weighed me (+0.5lb!) she said, "Well...you know...definitely call us if you think something starts happening. But...," I interrupted her. "But, you'll most likely see me next week, right?"
"Right," she said, laughing. "I'm sure I will. Hey, hopefully you'll deliver this month!"
Ha. Hahaha. Not funny.
Not that I'm in a huge hurry to start living life with a newborn again (aka a "living hell" according to my pediatrician) but truth be told, I'd like to start living life wearing clothes other than the same pair of navy blue sweatpants and my husband's XXL Seattle Mariners throwback t-shirt.
So, moving on. To clarify my position on the aforementioned "push present" concept. Where to begin? Let's address this comment from the lovely KK:
KK writes: "...What the hell is a push present? Please don't tell me it' s present the mom receives for "pushing" out a baby?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"
Oh yes, KK. Appallingly yes. Yes it is. Just the term itself makes my skin crawl.
Now, I'm not even gonna try to front. I am certainly not one to turn down a present. Especially one from Mr. P. But - what appalls me is when I read about ladies who EXPECT a present for giving birth. Yeah, you carried a baby for 9 months. Yeah, it definitely sucks at times, especially towards the end. But, uh, I'm pretty sure you signed up for it, no? At least in most cases. If you have ever spent any time on a pregnancy message board, which I definitely have, you'll come across all these posts where the "push present" is discussed AT LENGTH. Along the lines of "SO! What are you getting for your push present?" And, "Oooh! I'm so asking for THAT as my push present!"
I don't know. I guess I can see that it's kind of sweet when a guy wants to do something nice for his wife (partner, baby mama, what have you) for a job well done. But. Ultimately what turns me off so completely is the whole expectation on the part of some that you somehow DESERVE some sort of present. For doing your part. And yes, your part is giving birth.
(There's no way around that. I've checked into it and there really isn't. Kidding.)
Just for the record, the last time I gave birth, my "push present" from Mr. P was a large french vanilla iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts, light with milk and 3 splenda. After approximately 60 hours of labor and almost four hours of pushing, it was the best present I've ever received.