Waterboarding doesn't have anything on this

In about 30 minutes I will be boarding a school bus have I ever mentioned that I get carsick that is filled with 80 crazed & hormonal lovely 5th graders. We will be driving for about 30 minutes, in the rain to go to a reenactment of something with the Underground Railroad. Where we will be outside in this mess-all day long. Did I mention that it was outside? I know that I will be soaked when I get home & there is nothing in this world that I find more disgusting or upsetting than my fingers and toes getting wrinkly. In fact my family routinely likes to touch me with their wrinkly fingers to gross me out to laugh at me when I get my fingers in this said state.

So if you don't hear from me for a while it is because I either floated away, hitched a ride on an ark, was committed-see above 80 5th graders-or I was recruited by the government to further explain these torturous ways. Because, Dude, if you aren't going to talk after being out in the rain, after traveling on a bus, with 80 5th graders then chances are you never will.