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Posted Jul 27 2011 2:18am
My mom had surgery yesterday morning and I was a nervous wreck until I knew she was out of surgery. She hurt herself years ago and had to have reconstructive surgery to repair the damage that was done. My aunt is here from California and is helping her get up and around over the next few days as well as my younger sister who is spending the next few days home with her to help. My mom's surgery was at 7 am on her side of town and she suggested I just wait until after she was out to come visit cuz she didn't want me waking the kids up at 4 am for a two hour drive to her side of town to wait in a hospital waiting room with them. I barely slept and had my sister send me updates every hour until she was out. We visited her after she'd settled in at home. Franky wanted to "take gamma fowers (flowers)" but he took her a tray of baklava from Shatila instead (she loves their sweets).  My mom is a freakin' warrior. She is the STRONGEST woman I have ever known. She was up and getting around on crutches and was her usual, funny self. I love my mom to death and I don't know what I'd do without her. She takes things in stride, her surgery included. I teased her on our way out and told her to get as much rest as she could cuz even Super Heroes hang up their capes sometimes. I definitely get my strength from her. I plan to visit her in the next day or two to help however I can and see my aunt again before she goes back home.

Flip Disposables. 
We ran out of disposable liners recently and were going to be out and about, where rinsing poopy diapers wasn't an option, so I dipped into the disposable inserts. I wouldn't use them for every day use, but they served their purpose for visits with friends and family. I tossed the poopy inserts, along with sposie wipes I picked up specifically for our trips, in the trash. They are not nearly as absorbent as Stay Dry inserts and I ended up doubling them up to make it more convenient. I would still prefer to use them on vacation as opposed to sposie diapers, but unless we're vacationing, I won't be buying them again. I'll invest in more sposie liners.We're either going to invest in a case of liners or a diaper sprayer while we're staying with my in-law's. Ry wants a sprayer while I wouldn't mind the liners.

 Flip disposable insert. 

 Flip cover + disposable insert. 
Rather than toss a bunch of Stay Dry inserts and Flip covers into the diaper bag for long outings, I've been pre-stuffing diapers and it's made long outings a lot easier.
Meanies. I may sound like an evil person, but I seriously dislike kids who are mean to mine. I don't like looking at them let alone being around them. I feel evil even saying it, but I'm just being honest. Franky has gotten awesome about standing up for himself but there are certain kids who've been rotten to him from day one that he is less than thrilled to be around. I'm noticing it's a mutual distaste for eachother, between the kids. Certain kids pick on him for no reason at all. They approach him from across the room to scream in his face or push him. I've been passive enough and have hoped that the parents would step up but they haven't so I've resorted to calling the kids out, as in, "Please DO NOT push him, it's not nice," and then telling Franky "if they can't play nice then just don't play by them." I'm so proud of him for standing his ground and know it's only a matter of time before he stops being nice and starts defending himself against those who are mean to him.
Answers. I got a few more questions about moving in with my in-law's so I'll answer them as honestly as I can.  
Sex. Truthfully, it's a non-issue at this point in the game. That was the last thing on my list of things to worry about with moving in with Ryan's parents. They work full time, his sister works and goes to school and his grandparents play bridge a few times a week. It will NOT be happening if anyone is home, that's for damn sure. I'm sure that will limit us, but we have more important things to work on with our marriage and, honestly, that's the last thing on my mind (and, truthfully, very low on my list of priorities). We're still in a hell of a rocky place and have reached a make it or break it stage. We're doing this for the sake of our family. If we make it, we'll buy a house and move forward. If we break it, I'll move in with my mom, he'll stay there and we'll spend equal amounts of time with our kids. I'm hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.
Drinking. At the end of the day, there's nothing better than an ice-cold Bud Light Lime or chilled glass of Riunite Lambrusco, but I don't need it to survive. I'm perfectly fine without it. I quit smoking cold-turkey twice and didn't drink while pregnant twice. It's a non-issue for me. My in-law's aren't drinkers and I respect that. I will never disrespect their home.

Sleep. Since there are two big beds and one enormous walk-in closet in the room we'll be staying in, the plan is for Marija and I to continue co-sleeping in one bed while Ryan crashes in the other and Franky sleeps in his pull-out toddler couch thing in the closet or  Franky will sleep with either Ry or I. I guess we'll just see how it all works out best.
Fears. I have some major fears about moving in with Ryan's parents. What if they hate me living there (I know Ryan, Franky and Marija will be non-issues) but I'm scared they'll hate having me there. What if I overstay my welcome? What if I'm a bigger burden than benefit? What if I become the house "bitch," (as in hated person?). Can you tell I'm paranoid? While I tend to keep people at arm's length, over the years, I've managed to adopt Ryan's family as my own. I spend more time with them than I do my own and I genuinely love and respect them. Obviously, in the event of the demise of my marriage, I'd be devastated to lose having them in my life and I think that's why I maintain keeping them at arm's length. I never want anyone to feel like I'm trying to take over when my honest-to-God intent is to be helpful. I don't want anyone to be offended if I decide to make dinner or mop the floors. I hope and pray for the best and I'm sure I'm over-thinking and over-worrying everything.
Misconceptions. I think sometimes I come off as a stone-cold bitch and I don't mean to. I love my husband to the ends of the earth and back. He still sends chills up my spine, makes my skin tingle and there isn't a thing I wouldn't do for him. I am madly in love with him. I haven't ever not been. I don't want to ever give the impression that I don't love, respect or value my husband. He gives me butterflies unlike any I've ever felt. He is my everything. I live and breathe for him and the beautiful little beings we've created. Every couple has their ups and downs. We've had our fair share of downs, but I love, am in love with, and would die for my husband. 
House. We stopped by the house to check things out today and found multiple notices about the lawn (funny how they send citations to the house but tickets to the apartment, huh?). Someone stole things from the yard and the city had been out to mow the lawn. I have a court date in the middle of August about it. I will likely have to pay a hefty fine and will get a misdemeanor about not mowing the lawn. I set things in motion today with the bankruptcy and am untangling myself from that Godforsaken house. We stopped by city hall to file a FOIA (freedom of information act) to have them release the police report from the night our neighbor pulled a gun out on Ryan. Once they mail us the police report, we can take it to the apartment manager and break out of our lease a month early. Ryan's cousin and her kids are leaving August 15, so that's our approximate move-in date. We have to pack and rent a storage unit before then. To say I'm stressed and overwhelmed is an understatement.

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