Is there an etiquette book out there on what NOT to say to a pregnant woman? There should be.

Here are a few of the things that have been said to me – so far – that have been a little less than flattering. Of course, now that I’m in the third trimester (and waddling like a penguin), I have less patience for stupid people but seriously?! Even other moms have said some pretty stupid things to me, such as:

1. “Oh, you look so cute. Your belly is the only thing that’s gotten fat.” – Um, did you just call me fat? Using the word cute beforehand does not soften the blow. I don’t consider myself fat (I’m pregnant) but thanks for bringing the extra weight to my attention. I hadn’t noticed until now.

2. “You must be due any day now!” - No, actually, I have a few months to go but thanks for asking. You know what happens when you assume…

3. “Oh, you’re having another boy?” - When this is said in a negative tone, you suck. You might as well have said, I’m sorry to hear that,” since that’s exactly how I interpret your expression. That’s pretty much why I’m looking at you with that blank stare. I have no idea what to say next. Other than STFU.

4. “Are you sure there’s only one in there?” – Again, I already know how big I am, I don’t need you to remind me that I can’t see my own feet or that I could knock out a small toddler if I swing my stomach in their direction unexpectedly.

5. “Looks like you’ve got a bun in the oven.” – Really?! People still use this expression? Because it’s a stupid one.

What did people say to you while you were pregnant that annoyed you? Let’s share – and then get over it because I know none of the people saying these things meant any harm but, at least for me, the third trimester = PMS, so you’ve been warned.

Oh, and for those of you who have asked first before touching my growing belly, thank you. I don’t mind being rubbed down like Buddah, but respecting me enough to ask my permission first makes this mama happy.

Happy Healthy Hip Parenting
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